Pixels

Pixels

Posted on July 23, 2015 at 5:37 pm

C-
Lowest Recommended Age: Middle School
MPAA Rating: Rated PG-13 for some language and suggestive comments
Profanity: A few bad words
Alcohol/ Drugs: Drinking, including drinking to deal with stress and alcohol humor
Violence/ Scariness: Sci-fi action-style violence, no one permanently injured
Diversity Issues: Some sexist and homophobic "humor"
Date Released to Theaters: July 24, 2015
Date Released to DVD: October 26, 2015
Copyright Sony 2015

I never thought I’d see Max Headroom or “Fantasy Island” again, much less have to explain them to someone sitting next to me who was a toddler when they were on television, but Adam Sandler is still relentlessly working his slacker way through every pop culture meme of the decade where he spent his late teens and early 20’s, and apparently the last decade he was willing to pay attention to. He’s used up most of the good ones. That means that this is another film that was pieced together from the cutting room floors of his previous movies plus VH1’s “I Love the 80’s” series. Yes, I know that it is impossible to believe that there was anything worth remembering that happened in the 80’s that they did not cover. And yet, here we are, with a movie about 1980’s arcade games that have become real-life alien invaders. If you remember and retain some affection for games like Frogger, Pac-Man, Tetris, and Q*bert, or if you like Sandler and are relieved he is not making “Grown-Ups 3,” then you might get a few smiles out of “Pixels.”

Grading on a curve, it is tempting to provide some positive reinforcement for Sandler, who in the hands of director Chris Columbus, is better than some of his recent films. But just because it is safe to say he probably will not be a winner at the Razzies this year does not merit him an endorsement. This movie is less predictable and less entertaining than the charmingly retro 8 bit games to which it pays tribute. And unfortunately, one more element carried over from the 80’s is the idea that homophobic and sexist jokes are funny and permissible. Having a female character be a capable military officer does not mean that it is okay to have the other female characters be one-dimensional (literally, one one case).

Sandler, looking puffy and bored, plays Sam, a Geek Squad-style technician who installs fancy television and gaming equipment in people’s homes. In a flashback, we see that as a kid, he had a natural facility to recognize the patterns in arcade games and made it to second in a national competition. The winner was Eddie (Peter Dinklage from “Game of Thrones”), a mullet-coiffed braggart who triumphed over him in the final round. Another competitor was a whiz kid named Ludlow (Josh Gad, “Frozen’s” Olaf) with poor social skills, conspiracy theories, and a pretty pervy obsession with a video game avatar. And Sam’s loyal friend and supporter was Cooper (Kevin James).

Footage of the competition was sent into space to introduce the galactic community to life on Earth. But it was misinterpreted as a declaration of war, and now the aliens have arrived. Just as in the era of arcade games, they wreak destruction by dissolving everything around them into pixels, according to the same rules and patterns of the original games. Fortunately, if improbably, Cooper is now the President of the United States. So he is able to call on Sam, Eddie (who has to be sprung from prison), and Ludlow to save the day. Helping to coordinate the defense is Violet (Michelle Monaghan), first met by Sam when he is installing a television/game system in her home and finds her sobbing in the closet over her husband leaving her for a Pilates instructor named Sinnamon (with an S) and he comforts and then hits on her. But it turns out that she is actually a top military officer who can muster whole new categories of weapons, train the SEALS, and engage in sizzle-free romantic banter at the same time.

The effects in the battle scenes are fun, turning these very rudimentary characters into real space invaders without losing their iconic 8 bit design. Centipede in particular is impressive, glowing like a Chinese New Year Parade dragon made from Lite-Brite as he slithers through the mushrooms. Like some of the other arcade characters, he is far more vivid and has more personality than the humans in the story.

Parents should know that this film has a handful of bad words, potty humor, sci-fi/action violence with peril and apparent injuries, brief comic view of a portion of a bare butt, and comic but crude sexual references including a threesome. There are alcohol jokes and alcohol is used to deal with stress.

Family discussion: Why did coming in second change Sam’s life? Is Violet a snob? How could the skills you have help save the planet?

If you like this, try: “The King of Kong,” “Wreck-It Ralph,” and “Galaxy Quest”

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Comedy DVD/Blu-Ray Fantasy movie review Movies -- format Science-Fiction
Exclusive Blooper Clip: Paul Blart Mall Cop 2

Exclusive Blooper Clip: Paul Blart Mall Cop 2

Posted on June 25, 2015 at 11:05 pm

We are delighted to present an exclusive clip from the DVD extras on Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2. It’s a lot of fun to see Kevin James mess up his lines!

It’s available on Digital HD June 30, 2015 and on Blu-ray™ Combo Pack & DVD July 14, 2015. The Blu-ray bonus features include deleted scenes, a gag reel, and eight featurettes.

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Trailers, Previews, and Clips

Here Comes the Boom

Posted on October 11, 2012 at 6:00 pm

Kevin James is so gosh-darned likable that he can make up for a lot of sub-par material, but not even he can make this tiresome effort work.  James co-wrote the story, an attempted feel-good saga of a lost-mojo high school science teacher who finds his passion when the school’s music budget is cut and he decides to raise the money to save it by losing a series of mixed martial arts fights, inspiring everyone around him and winning the love of the school nurse.  But the movie itself comes nowhere near mojo.  It taps out right from the start and the promised Boom never arrives.

James plays Scott, who is as unenthusiastic about his students as the texting teacher in the recent “Won’t Back Down.”  He does not do much other than hit on School Nurse Flores (Selma Hayek), who has as little interest in him as he as in his job, his self-respect, or his future.  But he takes pity on the sweet-natured music teacher Marty Streb (Henry Winkler), who loves teaching, because budget cuts eliminate the music program just as Marty’s wife, defying the odds, becomes pregnant in her late 40’s.  Scott promises to help.  He takes on another job, teaching immigrants how to pass their citizenship tests, which leads to a painful scene of condescending ethnic humor.  People from other countries don’t speak good English!  Alert the media!

One of those students is Niko (real-life MMA star Bas Rutten, a James regular), an exercise instructor and MMA coach.  Scott finds out how much money can be made by losing MMA matches and decides that since he was a college wrestler, he is “good enough to lose.”  Cue the training montage and the beat-down montage.  And a limply staged and random food fight.  And the mojo montage, as everyone is inspired by this very uninspiring underdog story.  They could have included a montage of me looking at my watch.  It would last as long and be almost as exciting.

I did enjoy the use of Neil Diamond as Scott’s entrance music and Ruten has some rough charm.  But Scott’s attempts to make a connection between stagnant cells and the dispiriting state of schools where teachers “can’t speed up the good ones or slow down for the other ones” falls flat because the film’s own lack of energy feels pretty stagnant itself. Boom, you say?  More like a sigh.

Parents should know that this film has extended and sometimes intense “action-style” mixed martial arts violence, with no blood or graphic injuries except a dislocated shoulder but a lot of beating up and getting beaten up. It also has some language, some crude humor (barfing, crotch hit, jokes about fertility of an older woman and about cross-dressing), an AA meeting, and some ethnic humor.

Family discussion: What does “good enough to lose” mean? How did Scott’s experiences as a fighter change the way he thought about teaching? How can someone be jealous of someone else’s passion?

If you like this, try: Kevin James’ “Paul Blart: Mall Cop” or a more dramatic film about MMA fighters, “Warrior”

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Comedy High School Romance Sports

Hotel Transylvania

Posted on September 27, 2012 at 6:00 pm

B
Lowest Recommended Age: 4th - 6th Grades
MPAA Rating: Rated PG for some rude humor, action, and scary images
Profanity: Some schoolyard language
Alcohol/ Drugs: None
Violence/ Scariness: Funny-scary monsters
Diversity Issues: A theme of the movie
Date Released to Theaters: September 28, 2012
Amazon.com ASIN: B0034G4OYA

What scared me most about “Hotel Transylvania” was the prospect of another film starring Adam Sandler and Andy Samberg.  Their last collaboration was “That’s My Boy,” by far the most excruciatingly painful experience I’ve had at a theater this year. Thankfully, just providing voices for this PG animated horror comedy written by five other people, Sandler and Samberg are charming.  It is a sweet, funny story about monsters who want to enjoy a peaceful life far from humans and the human who finds them anyway.

Sandler plays Count Dracula, a doting if over-protective vampire father who builds the hotel as a refuge so he and his daughter Mavis (Selena Gomez) can be safe from scary people with their pitchforks and torches.   Dracula croons a tender lullaby: “Hush little baby, don’t say a word, papa’s going to bite the head off a bird.”  Next to the changing table is a coffin-shaped diaper pail.

Mavis gets a little older, with cute little baby tooth fangs, and her caped father makes sure she’s wearing a helmet before he teaches her how to transform into a bat and fly.  The hotel is a castle surrounded by a haunted forest and a graveyard populated by the undead. “Human-free since 1898,” the hotel proudly proclaims.  And so things stay for over a century.

This Dracula has no need for human blood (“it’s so fatty and you don’t know where it’s been”).  He relies on synthetic.  All he wants is to take care of his guests, give his daughter a wonderful 118th birthday party, make sure she never leaves home, and never, ever see a human.   But then, just as all of the monsters have arrived for the party, an easy-going bro with an enormous back-pack walks in.  His name is Jonathan (Samberg), he thinks the monsters are cool, and he likes Mavis’ goth-girl vibe.  This is worse than torches and pitchforks.  A human who wants to get rid of monsters is one thing but a daughter who might fall in love with one is even scarier.  And yes, there a wink at “Twilight.”

Of the three animated horror 3D comedies this fall, “Hotel Transylvania” is the least aesthetically ambitious, the most accessible for younger children, and the closest to the comfortingly silly scares of “Scooby-Doo.”   Like this film, “ParaNorman” (now in theaters) and “Frankenweenie” (opening next week), the focus is on showing us that what we think is scary really is not very frightening after all.  Of the three, this one has more all-out comedy, much of it coming from the monster-fied setting and the ghoul-ification of ordinary life.  At Hotel Transylvania, the Do Not Disturb signs hanging from the doorknobs are shrunken heads — very outspoken ones.  Mavis likes to eat “scream” cheese, which amusingly rises up from the cracker to let out a squeal as she takes a bite.  Guests are greeted by zombie bellman, a Jack Pumpkinhead doorman, and a skeleton mariachi band with hats and sarapes.  When the Invisible Man (David Spade) attempts to play charades, it is a hoot.

First-time director Genndy Tartakovsky was a storyboard artist on films like “Iron Man 2,” so he has an exceptional understanding of the mechanics and timing of the action sequences, and 3D adds a vertiginous thrill to a chase on flying tables and a touch of claustrophobia to a maze of underground corridors.  It is telling that both of those highlights involve the most vivid vampire/human relationship at the heart of the story — Dracula and Jonathan. Despite a lot of talk about romantic “zing,” the bromance is much more real than the love story.  And when they leave the castle for that most overused of climax cliches, the race to the airport, the story sags.

Top voice talent includes Kevin James as a sweet-natured Frankenstein and Fran Drescher as his bride, Steve Buscemi and Molly Shannon as the Wolf couple with innumerable cubs, and Ceelo Green as the outgoing Mummy.  But the real stars are character designers Carter Goodrich (“Despicable Me”), Greg Kellman (“Madagascar”), and Carlos Grangel (“King Fu Panda”), whose monsters pay affectionate homage to their origins but are so endearing that families may want to pay a visit to have room service deliver an order of scream cheese.

 

 

 

Parents should know that the monsters in this movie are intended to be more funny than scary but there are some grotesque and macabre images that may be frightening to young or sensitive children as well as some potty humor and peril.

Family discussion: Why was Dracula so afraid to let Mavis leave home?  How can parents know when their children are ready for more responsibility?  Which monster was your favorite?

If you like this, try: “ParaNorman,” “Monster House,” “Monsters vs. Aliens,” and “Scooby-Doo”

 

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3D Animation Comedy Fantasy Movies -- format Romance

Zookeeper

Posted on July 7, 2011 at 6:00 pm

D
Lowest Recommended Age: Middle School
MPAA Rating: Rated PG for some rude and suggestive humor and language
Profanity: Fake swearing ("frickin'") and some crude potty language
Alcohol/ Drugs: Social drinking
Violence/ Scariness: Comic peril and violence, reference to abuse of animals
Diversity Issues: Diverse characters
Date Released to Theaters: July 9, 2011
Date Released to DVD: October 11, 2011

This is a movie about how Kevin James can do so much better, but Kevin James can do so much better than this movie.  In the film, he tries to change his life to be worthy of a woman he thinks he loves.  In the audience, we want him to stop making movies about what a shlub he is.

James and a team including some of his “King of Queens” writers have produced a dull and oddly mean-spirited movie about a zookeeper who takes advice about dating (or, as the animals call it, “mating”) from the talking animals at his zoo.

The woman he likes is a fashion designer named Stephanie (the game and able Leslie Bibb), who dumps him in the first five minutes of the film after a proposal.  Still heartbroken five years later, Griffin (James) sees her again.  At first, he resists her indications of interest but then, just as he begins to respond, another old boyfriend enters the picture (Joe Rogan as Gale).  The animals decide to reveal their secret power of speech so they can give Griffin some guidance on how to get Stephanie back.  As you can imagine (and as perhaps you would rather not), the animals have their own ideas about how to attract the opposite gender.  Since, except for the bickering lions (voices of Sylvester Stallone and Cher!), none of them appear to have significant others of any species, their advice is of questionable value.  Nevertheless, this gives us an opportunity to see James walking like a bear and marking his territory like a wolf.  Thankfully, he does not follow the monkey’s direction about what to throw.

But there isn’t much more to be thankful for.  Adam Sandler (who provides the voice of the monkey) produced, which means it’s yet another slacker no-effort film, with another soundtrack filled with 80’s songs not to make any point or for any particular purpose but just because that’s the last time Sandler listened to the radio.  And despite its superficial endorsement of being yourself and doing what you love, that over-done message is eclipsed by a weird turn in the third act.   Griffin takes advice from the animals that seems to have been stolen from Mystery the Pickup Artist.  They tell him to keep Stephanie off-balance by alternating insults and affection to make her insecure — and it works, not just on her but on others as well.  There is a cliched race-t0-the-airport scene which makes no sense in an era of cell phones, but it does show us what and who is important to Griffin — until a pointless and distracting detour just so he can hit someone along the way that undermines that message as well.  Griffin does some things he is not proud of but makes no attempt to fix his mistakes.  The film seems to suggest that it is all right, even a sign of strength and confidence to hurt someone’s feelings.

The PG rating should not be a signal that this is a kids’ movie.  Children will not be very interested in Griffin’s romantic adventures or the night out on the town he gives to the zoo’s melancholy gorilla (“Send some fried zucchini to that table of secretaries,” he tells the waitress).  It’s downright smarmy, with the use of fake swear words like “frickin'” to keep the MPAA ratings board at bay.  Poor Ken Jeong for the second week in a row is stuck in a humiliatingly shrill, borderline racist caricature as a snake specialist and Donnie Wahlberg is wasted as an animal-abusing zoo staffer.

James is a talented and appealing performer and even this mess can’t hide the radiant beauty and class of Rosario Dawson as a warm-hearted zoo vet. There are a few nice moments when Dawson sails across a dance floor on acrobat’s streamers and a few it-could-have-been-worse moments when it turns out that Griffin is not the usual comedy movie incompetent. He has a nice relationship with his brother and is good at what he does.  But James and Dawson could be so much better doing something else.

(more…)

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Comedy Movies -- format Romance Talking animals
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