Lady in the Water

Posted on July 17, 2006 at 4:16 pm

C
Lowest Recommended Age: Middle School
MPAA Rating: Rated PG-13 for some frightening sequences.
Profanity: None
Alcohol/ Drugs: Smoking, some social drinking
Violence/ Scariness: Intense peril, suspense, tension, some violence, mostly off-screen
Diversity Issues: Diverse characters
Date Released to Theaters: 2006
Date Released to DVD: 2006
Amazon.com ASIN: B000JLTR8Q

There is no conventional rating scale that could do justice to this film. It is a terrible movie, but it is terrible in an interesting and often highly watchable way. There have been better films that I have enjoyed less. The C grade is not an indication of mediocrity; it is an average of the movie’s successes and failures.


Let’s start with the successes. First and most important is that M. Night Shyamalan is unquestionably a superb director with a brilliant understanding of how to use the camera to tell a story. Second is Paul Giamatti, who plays handyman/caretaker Cleveland Heep with sensitivity and conviction. Sarita Choudhury also brings a vibrant and lively spirit to the film.


But it is in a way the extraordinary ability and subtlety of those elements that undermine the film as a whole by providing a contrast to the stunningly self-indulgent claptrap they are attempting to serve.


Director Shyamalan makes the mistake of working from a fundamentally unworkable script by, who was that screenwriter again? Oh, yes, M. Night Shyamalan, who seems to be, as we say, working through some issues.

We see some of his favorite themes — the damaged doctor, the wise child, the characters stunned by devastating trauma, the spooky creatures lurking somewhere out there. But we also see what looks like petty payback. This is a story in which story-tellers are magically powerful while those who criticize them are half buffoon and half pompous but ineffectual know-it-all, and doomed to a uniquely awful fate. This is the movie equivalent of Barry Manilow wailing about how he writes the songs that make the whole world sing with an extra verse more than an hour long about how no one understands and appreciates him enough.


Though set in a dingy apartment complex outside of Philadelphia, this is a fairy tale. As the movie begins, we are told with simple line drawings of a time in which another race of beings called the Narf were in contact with humans. But then humans became greedy and wanted to own the land and the Narf could not communicate with them any more.

Heep (the names in this film make Pilgrim’s Progress looke subtle) discovers something, someone swimming in the pool at night. It is a narf (Bryce Dallas Howard from Shyamalan’s The Village). She has been called from her world to deliver a message to someone in the complex who is trying to write something. Her name is….Story.


Heed asks around to figure out which resident is in need of the message. It turns out there are several writers on the premises, including a book and film critic named Farber, perhaps named for legendary critic Manny Farber (Bob Balaban). But the Writer sought by Story because his writing will change the world is….none other than our very own story-teller, writer-director Shyamalan as Vick Ran, who has been stuck in the middle of writing a book about his ideas.


Does Story have a message for Vick? A story to tell him? No, it turns out one look from her is like a mega-dose of Ritalin; all of a sudden he is completely clear and focused and bangs that sucker out in a few hours.


The rest of the film is about getting Story back home. All Heed has to do is persuade one of the residents, a Korean woman, to tell him the bedtime story she heard from her mother, which has all of the details about every obstacle the Narf will face and every kind of help that is available to her.

The disparate residents of the complex may have been drawn there because they have exactly the talents she needs, but how to know who has what? Fortunately, no one wastes any time doubting Heed’s story. Unfortunately, instead they waste their time trying to sell this flimsy, self-serving mush.


Shyamalan promised that there would be no surprise twist ending this time. He is right. Although there are some good spooky moments and some surprisingly comic ones, you can tell where this one is going right from the start. But he is also wrong. The surprise twist is how far this is from what we know he can do. Shyamalan is a truly great story-teller. This is just a truly empty story.

Parents should know that this is a very intense film with a good deal of peril and suspense and some jump-out-at-you surprises and ominous portents. While most of the violence occurs off-screen, we do see graphic wounds. Characters smoke cigarettes and there is some social drinking. A strength of the movie is the way diverse characters live in a community of tolerance and lack of prejudice.


Families who see this movie should talk about the kinds of myths and other stories that transcend all cultures and the reason that stories — like movies — are important. Are you more like a healer, a symbol interpreter, a guardian, or part of a guild?


Families who enjoy this movie will also enjoy The Sixth Sense, Signs, and The Village.

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Fantasy Movies -- format Mystery Thriller

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest

Posted on July 4, 2006 at 11:53 am

A+
Lowest Recommended Age: Middle School
MPAA Rating: Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of adventure violence, including frightening images.
Profanity: Some colorful sailor-talk
Alcohol/ Drugs: Drinking
Violence/ Scariness: Constant action-style violence, whipping scene, some gross images, scary monster with lots and lots of teeth
Diversity Issues: Strong female characters
Date Released to Theaters: July 7, 2006
Date Released to DVD: October 1, 2006
Amazon.com ASIN: B000I0RQVI

This is what big summer blockbuster studio movies are all about — love, honor, humor, villains evil enough to make it really satisfying when they are beaten and scary enough to keep you wondering whether it’s possible, and thrilling stunts and big explosions.

It’s summer. We don’t want to think too hard. A little silliness is fine, and we’re more than willing to abandon any thoughts about whether this bears any relation to history or reality or the laws of time and space. We do ask, though that someone has thought it through at least enough so that we can enjoy it without any intrusive “Hey, wait a second” moments. And of course it helps to throw in some cannibals, a voodoo enchantress, an undead monkey, a guy with an octopus head, and the return of Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow. The result is a perfect popcorn pleasure, one of the most sensationally entertaining movies of the year.


It is supposed to be the wedding day for Elizabeth (Kiera Knightly) and Will (Orlando Bloom). But they are arrested for helping Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) escape. Unless Will can find him and bring back something in Sparrow’s possession to give to the ambitious aspiring governor, they will both be executed. So Will goes off in search of Sparrow and Elizabeth goes off in search of Will.


But they are not the only ones looking for Sparrow. There are some cannibals who are deciding whether they will be better off with him as their god — or their main course. And then there’s the little matter of Davy Jones, he of the “locker” where the spirits of the deep are kept. He sails in the famous ghost ship called the Flying Dutchman with a part human/part sea-creature crew that includes Will’s father. And they want something from Sparrow, too.


This gives us plenty of time for swashbuckling sword fights (including one on a mill wheel that is near Indiana Jones quality), deliciously dangerous predicaments and clever getaways, true love, and non-stop adventure. The screen almost explodes with visual splendor so witty and imaginative that the production designer shouldn’t just get an Oscar; he should get a MacArthur genius grant.


So does Bill Nighy (the addled rock star from Love, Actually) for managing to not just make us believe in the octopus-face, but managing to act through it as well. His eyes and voice are magnificently expressive and deliciously malevolent. Naomie Harris has a blast with a deliciously witty performance as a voodoo priestess who has what appears to be squid ink leaking from her tattoos. She has no illusions about Captain Jack Sparrow but gets quite a kick out of him.


Director Gore Verbinski stages the imaginative stunts with high spirits and keeps things moving. He also manages to give the audience enough time with the characters to keep us involved and on their side. And the cliff-hanger ending — and promise of Keith Richards as Sparrow’s father — leave us happily hungry for part III.

Parents should know that this movie has non-stop action-style violence, including a scary sea monster with a zillion teeth. At times it is very intense, with characters injured and killed. A son is whipped by his father leaving bloody wounds. While most of the rest of the film is not gory, there are some gross images some audience members will find funny but others may find disgusting and overly graphic. There are some mild sexual references, and characters drink rum. It does not include the usual four-letter words, but there is some vivid and salty sailor-talk. Some audience members may be disturbed by references to the occult.


Families who see this movie should talk about why the compass stops working for Jack. What is important to him? How can you tell? Families might also like to investigate the source of some of the legends in this film like the flying Dutchman and Davy Jones’ locker.


Families who enjoy this movie will also enjoy the original, The Crimson Pirate, Gilbert and Sullivan’s Pirates of Penzance, Gene Kelly and Judy Garland in the musical The Pirate, and the underrated Shipwrecked. The classic ride at Disneyland and Disney World has been redesigned with changes from the movies, including the addition of Captain Jack Sparrow. Check here for updates.

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Action/Adventure Comedy Fantasy Movies -- format

Superman Returns

Posted on June 27, 2006 at 11:59 am

B+
Lowest Recommended Age: 4th - 6th Grades
MPAA Rating: Rated PG-13 for some intense action violence.
Profanity: Some crude language
Alcohol/ Drugs: Smoking, drinking, scene in bar
Violence/ Scariness: Frequent action violence, characters in peril (including child), major character badly hurt, characters injured and killed, brief joke about death of dog
Diversity Issues: None
Date Released to Theaters: 2006
Date Released to DVD: 2006
Amazon.com ASIN: B001F3FUK6

Superman has returned. In the movie, Superman (now played by Brandon Routh) comes back to earth after five years in search of his roots on the exploded planet Krypton, and the inhabitants of earth are overjoyed. In real life, Superman has come back to summer audiences in search of the popcorn pleasures of explosions and flying, and the inhabitants of earth will be, if not overjoyed, happily entertained.


Routh is better than he needs to be. He’s a Superman with soul who makes his soaring flights expressions of his existential longing. But superhero movies depend on their villains, and this one has Kevin Spacey happily chewing up every piece of scenery in sight as Lex Luthor and is almost sinfully entertaining. He just loves being bad and we love watching it.


Director Bryan Singer (The Usual Suspects, X-Men) nimbly navigates the tricky balance between the old-school purists (the Lois and Jimmy of the 1950’s television show have cameos and there are clever connections to the original comic book, the 1930’s radio program, and the 1978 Christopher Reeve movie) and 21st century sensibility, with existential questions: does the world need Superman? Does he need us?


Lois Lane (Kate Bosworth) does not think so. She has a fiance, a dashing pilot named Richard (James Marsden, switching from Marvel’s X-Men to D.C.’s Superman) who conveniently happens to be the nephew of choleric editor Perry White. She has a son named Jason, a cute kid with long hair and asthma. And she has a Pulitzer Prize for an editorial arguing that the world is better off without Superman.


But before Perry can say “Great Ceasar’s ghost” Supe has suited up and is rescuing Lois again. She’s on a fancy new jet, covering its first flight, when everything goes wrong. The rescue is thrillingly staged, the kind of sequence summer popcorn movies are made for. Routh has the square jaw to make us believe in the man of steel and the puppy eyes to make us want to hang a poster in our locker after study hall. He and Bosworth make a picture-perfect couple, with their matching chins and dazzling smiles. The special effects are gorgeous; the bad guy is deliciously evil.


But it is easier to like than love. Traditionally, people have fallen into one camp or the other: Superman or Batman. There are those who like the dark, brooding, vulnerable Batman and those who prefer the more optimistic, confident, sometimes naive, outgoing Superman. Perhaps concluding that no one wants to see a cornfed boy from Smallville spout off about truth, justice, and the American way, this Superman is isolated by the mandate of the father he can barely remember. He was sent to Earth to help humans find their best selves and to protect them from their worst. That creates a barrier that prevents him from getting close to anyone. He loves Lois. He longs to be close to her. But he knows he cannot be what Richard is — a guy who can be there to help make dinner and pick up Jason from day care. He knows he must be willing to sacrifice everything, even his own life, to protect humanity. And Richard knows he can never be what Superman is, the man Lois loves. And of course Lex has some surprises for Superman, including a blade made from Kryptonite. Even Jason knows a few things that will surprise the adults in his life.


That’s a pretty soapy plot for a superhero movie. Some will find it rich and complex; some will find it overstuffed. It underuses some of its greatest resources, like Parker Posey (who looks sensational as Lex’s sidekick but doesn’t have enough to do) and Kal Penn as one of his indistinguishable henchmen. Some will admire the way Superman doesn’t just fly, but hovers. Others will think all that overlay gets in the way of the popcorn-chomping scenes and that Superman’s hovering makes him float like Tinkerbell. That pockmarked “S” on his chest looks like it was cut out of a bath mat, and the cape, while it billows nicely, is too dark. And the ending is not exciting enough to be a cliffhanger or satisfying enough to give a sense of resolution.


Still, Superman flies into space, lands an airplane in a baseball field, and rescues people all over the world. Bullets shatter when they hit his eyeball. He gives us the pleasure of watching a terrible villain, secure in the knowledge that Superman won’t let anything bad happen to us. Does the world need Superman, even a lonely, sometimes melancholy one? You bet we do.

Parents should know that the movie has a great deal of action-style (very little blood) violence. Characters are injured and killed and a child is in peril. Spoiler alerts: Superman is beaten and stabbed; some graphic and disturbing images. There is some crude language (pissed, crap) and there are some double entendres and mild sexual references. Lois is not married to the father of her child. Spoiler alert: the issue of the child’s paternity is raised.


Families who see this movie should talk about why Superman wanted to see what was left of Krypton. Older viewers might want to talk about some of the story’s themes parallel the New Testament or classic myths. They should talk about how Superman was created by a pair of teenagers who sold their idea for $130.


Families who enjoy this movie will enjoy all of the various depictions of Superman, going back to the original comic books, the television series (“Superman,” “Lois and Clark,” “Smallville,” cartoons), and the Christopher Reeve movies (but skip the last one). They also might like to see Bosworth and Spacey as Sandra Dee and Bobby Darrin in Beyond the Sea.

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Action/Adventure Fantasy Movies -- format Science-Fiction

Click

Posted on June 21, 2006 at 12:16 pm

B-
Lowest Recommended Age: High School
MPAA Rating: Rated PG-13 for language, crude and sex-related humor, and some drug references.
Profanity: Very strong language for a PG-13 including profanity used by children, f-word
Alcohol/ Drugs: Cigar smoking, drug jokes
Violence/ Scariness: Comic peril, serious illness, sad death
Diversity Issues: None
Date Released to Theaters: 2006
Date Released to DVD: 2006
Amazon.com ASIN: B000HT386M

Like Tom Cruise, Adam Sandler has based his career on playing shallow, callow boy-men who learn painful for him/humorous for us lessons about the importance of growing up. Those stories have enduring appeal on two levels. First, we get the pleasure of seeing someone who can be irresponsible and child-like, acting out a fantasy of superego-less freedom. And second, we get the reassuring conclusion to make us feel better about not having that freedom anymore. This is especially appealing to teenagers, who are at the brink of this transition.


This film is something of a transition for Sandler. He’s too old and beefy to play the boy-man who learns about romantic love as comedy, so here he plays architect Michael Newman, who is already married to Donna (Kate Beckinsale) and father of two young children. He is under a lot of pressure at work and feels overwhelmed. At Bed Bath and Beyond he enters a door marked “Way Beyond” and meets Morty (Christopher Walken), who gives him a “universal remote.” It can put real life on pause, mute, or fast forward. Michael can even access a commentary track and the movie’s best surprise is the identity of the narrator.


At first, he is delighted. He fast-forwards through a fight with Donna and mutes the dog. But then he finds out that the remote anticipates what he will select based on his past choices. Who can control the remote control?


The movie goes from silly (if often crude and discomfitingly cruel) to surprisingly serious, swelling strings and deathbed regrets, right up to the edge of maudlin. But Sandler keeps us rooting for Michael and Donna, in part because it is clear that Michael always loves his family and because it is clear that they always love him. There were times when I wanted a universal remote to hit “next chapter” to skip through repeated jokes about a dog having sex with a stuffed animal or children using four-letter words. The movie is too long. Sandler’s slacker passive agression was never appealing and get harder to take with each new iteration. But there are moments when the conclusion is genuinely affecting. It isn’t only Sandler’s characters that are growing up. I just wish we could hit fast-forward to move him there a little sooner.

Parents should know that, as often happens, the MPAA ratings board permits much more explicit sexual material in a PG-13 comedy than they would in a PG-13 drama. There are sexual references, crude jokes, and sexual situations that are in shadow but still fairly explicit, with post-sex discussion of whether it was satisfying for the woman and a running joke about a dog attempting to have sex with a stuffed animal (which, weirdly, Donna finds to be a turn-on). There are jokes about sexual harassment,small genitals, and repeated adultery. Characters use many four-letter words, and use of those words by children is intended to be humorous. A character smokes a cigar and there are some drug jokes. Characters eat a lot of junk food. There are serious illnesses, sad deaths and unhappy family situations, including divorce.


Families who see this movie should talk about what they would do with a “universal remote.” They should talk about times when they felt conflicts between work or school and family obligations and how they handled them.


Families who enjoy this movie will enjoy Sandler’s other films, including Big Daddy and The Wedding Singer. And they will enjoy other fantasies about people who realize the importance of family, from classics like A Christmas Carol and It’s a Wonderful Life to Multiplicity, Bruce Almighty, and The Family Man.

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Comedy Drama Fantasy Movies -- format

The Lake House

Posted on June 19, 2006 at 8:00 am

B
Lowest Recommended Age: 4th - 6th Grades
MPAA Rating: Rated PG for some language and a disturbing image.
Profanity: None
Alcohol/ Drugs: Drinking, scenes in bar
Violence/ Scariness: Non-graphic injuries, deaths, scenes in hospital
Diversity Issues: Diverse characters
Date Released to Theaters: 2006
Date Released to DVD: 2006
Amazon.com ASIN: B000HEWEE4

In honor of Sandra Bullock’s best all-time movie opening with “The Proposal,” this week’s DVD pick is another Bullock favorite.

Movie romances must have two things: an obstacle to keep the apart and a reason to root for them to get together. This has both. Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock have so much chemistry (perhaps based in part on our fond memories of Speed) that we can feel it even though this story gives them only one real scene together. And the obstacle is a nice one. They live in two different time zones. And by that I don’t mean EST and PST. They both live in CST — they’re in Chicago. I mean that Alex (Reeves) is an architect living 2004 and Kate (Bullock) is a doctor living in 2006.

Yeah. Don’t try to think it through too thoroughly. Just go with it. The tenderness of the story just might make it worthwhile.


Alex and Kate are connected by the title residence. It is a house on the lake, and by that I mean ON the lake. It is on stilts, made all of glass. The view is breathtaking but it is isolated. Kate moves out, leaving a note for the new occupant about forwarding her mail. But he is confused. As he moves in, no one has lived there for years. She refers to pawprints and a box that he can’t see. And the date on her note is two years in the future.


It seems the mailbox is a time/space continuum wormhole. Or maybe it is enchanted. The movie does not waste any time with explanations. It just shows us Kate and Alex, revealing themselves to each other through their letters and to us through their interactions with their friends, family, and colleagues. We see them grow toward each other, the very distance and strangness of the connection creating a place for each of them to thaw a part of them that has been isolated and frozen. We realize how — and why — destiny is bringing them together, and when it does, it is sweet and satisfying.


Bullock lowers the pilot light on her usual twinkle and allows herself to be vulnerable and even a little aloof. Reeves turns up the pilot light a little bit, giving us more than his usual blankness, letting us feel how much he wants to be with Kate and what he is willing to do to make it happen. If the two elements are there, a romantic story has an essential rightness that makes is possible, even a pleasure, to let ourselves believe in it. So, don’t ask whether there could be a house made of glass on top of a lake or whether Kate kept driving back to the mailbox. Just enjoy it.

Parents should know that characters drink (scenes in a bar). A boyfriend and girlfriend break up when she kisses someone else. A character is hit by a bus (offscreen) and dies and there is another sad death. Characters use some mild language.

Families who see this film should talk about how the lake house was a metaphor for Kate and Alex, giving them a view of great beauty but separating them from it.

Families who enjoy this movie will also enjoy other time-travel fantasies like Frequency and Somewhere In Time and another kind of story about love through letters, 84 Charing Cross Road. They will also enjoy Portrait of Jennie and the book that inspired it by Robert Nathan. And they will enjoy Jane Austen’s wonderful book Persuasion and the excellent movie version
.

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Drama DVD/Blu-Ray Pick of the Week Fantasy Romance
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