Norbit

Posted on February 6, 2007 at 12:26 pm

Eddie Murphy has taken his love for playing multiple roles, his love for Jerry Lewis (who also loved playing multiple roles), his love for racial humor, his love for crude humor, his love for himself, and — to be charitable — his deeply conflicted feelings about women, and made a movie that is disgusting, unfunny, dull, and an appalling waste of talent.

Its only entertainment value is in a couple of good gospel songs and its only shred of interest is as a disturbing piece of forensic evidence to help explain why one of the most talented and successful stars of the 1980’s has been making nothing but kiddie movies. Any respect he engendered by his comeback performance in Dreamgirls will be obliterated by the creepy non-funniness of this atrocity.
Eddie Murphy plays the title character, a nerdy wimp raised in an orphanage, by the choleric Chinese Mr. Wong (also Murphy). The only bright spot in his childhood is is friendship with Kate. After she is adopted, he has no one, until a large girl named Rasputia shows up and tells him he’s her boyfriend. When he grows up, he goes to work for her three thug brothers, who make a living doing construction and shaking down local businesses. And he marries Rasputia (Murphy again), now with huge, heavy rolls of fat and long, long nails.
Kate (Thandie Newton) shows up, planning to buy the orphanage and run it with her fiance, Deion (Cuba Gooding, Jr.). Is Deion sincere in his affection for Kate? Will Norbit find the courage to tell her how he feels? Will we have to see Rasputia in a skimpy bathing suit covered by rolls of fat? And getting a bikini wax?
I so wish I did not know the answers to these questions. I’d love to be able to eject all memories of this movie from my head.

Newton is so slender she makes Audrey Hepburn look like a linebacker. It’s as though she is trying to diet herself into invisibility, understandable given the hideous misogyny of the film and the thanklessness of her role. The closest thing to a bright moment comes from Eddie Giffin and Katt Williams as pimps named Pope Sweet Jesus and Lord Have Mercy. They do more with less material than Rasputia does with her skimpy lingerie.

Murphy’s real face, as the Norbit character, looks oddly stretched. And, though the story takes place in Tennessee, Norbit has a slight New York accent that echoes Jerry Lewis. His characters are all about the externals, shtick-ish and superficial.

In one scene, Norbit puts on a puppet show for the children and can’t help himself from turning it into a crude fight about infidelity. You get the sense that this is what Murphy is doing here, with the characters he plays the puppets he is using to express some of his anger at the people who want something from him, especially those rapacious women.

Murphy’s idol, Richard Pryor, had the same facilty for creating characters. And, like Murphy, he had some anger issues. But all of Murphy’s meticulous observation of Pryor missed the key point — Pryor brought a depth of understanding, humanity, and compassion to his characters — even a drug addict, even a neighbor’s dog that killed his favorite pet monkeys, even a crack pipe, even, though also the subject of some of his anger, himself. Murphy keeps it superficial and self-servingly egotistical, with characters and situations barely enough to sustain a seven-minute skit. No matter how many characters he plays, they are as artificial as Rasputia’s nails. Under the latex there is nothing but more latex.

Parents should know that this is an extremely crude and vulgar film, with much of the humor based on the idea of having sex with an enormously overweight woman. Two characters are pimps and there are references to prostitutes and paying for sex, to “old pervs,” and to a bar with nude entertainment. There is brief nudity. Characters use crude and strong language and racial epithets and insults, including inappropriate material in front of children.
Families who are interested in this film will probably prefer the better slob- comedies-with-heart Shallow Hal, Saving Silverman, The Jerk, and Big Mama’s House. They will also enjoy Murphy’s best work, on “Saturday Night Live” and in 48 Hours and Beverly Hills Cop and some of the Jerry Lewis films that inspired him, like Cinderfella.

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Comedy Romance

Music & Lyrics

Posted on February 5, 2007 at 12:34 pm

B+

Lowest Recommended Age:	High School
MPAA Rating:	Rated PG-13 for some sexual content.
Profanity:	Very brief strong language
Alcohol/ Drugs:	Brief reference to alcohol and drug abuse, social drinking
Violence/ Scariness:	Comic violence, punch
Diversity Issues:	None
Date Released to Theaters:	2007
Date Released to DVD:	2007
Amazon.com ASIN:	B00005JPE3

Comedy that is actually funny plus romance that is actually sweet equals a sunny little valentine to brighten the winter doldrums. And — I can’t help saying it — Hugh Grant and Drew Barrymore go together like music and lyrics. Do I hear groaning? Okay, you see this film and see if you can resist getting a little gooey.

The movie opens with a brilliantly inspired parody of an 80’s music video, so flawlessly hook-ish and instantly familiar we’re sure we’ve seen it one some middle-of-the-night “I Love the 80’s”/”Where Are They Now” shows. It’s a little bit Wham!, a little bit Duran Duran. Alex (Hugh Grant) was once a part of this pop group, until it broke up and his bandmate went on to a successful career in recording and movies. Alex has been making a living by appearing in nostalgia venues like 20th high school reunions, state fairs, and amusement parks, booked by his manager, Chris (Brad Garrett, of “Everybody Loves Raymond”). He is currently considering a cable TV show called “Battle of the 80’s Has-Beens,” though he points out helpfully that his group broke up in 1992, which makes him a 90’s has-been.

Then Alex gets a once-in-a-lifetime chance at a comeback, if he can write a song for reigning pop princess Cora (newcomer Haley Bennett) in a couple of days. But he has two problems. First, he hasn’t written a new song in about 20 years. And second, he writes music only — he needs someone to write the lyrics. And who better to join forces with than the adorably ditsy young woman who is the substitute plant-water-er, Sophie (Drew Barrymore). Soon they are making beautiful music together.

The setbacks and sour notes that intrude are just barely troubling enough to keep the story going and to reinforce our relief when everyone settles down for a big, fluffy, happily ever after.

Grant and Barrymore are at their very best and the material is perfectly suited to their strengths. Grant’s self-deprecating delivery polishes the dry wit of his dialogue to a glossy sheen. Barrymore’s ditzily adorable way with a line is just right for a talented young woman whose confidence has just been shaken by a bad romance. The fabulous Kristen Johnson makes the most of her role as Sophie’s sister, the kind of fan of Alex’s pop group who had his lunchbox and wrote his name surrounded by hearts on her 8th grade notebook. If the portions of the story dealing with Cora and Sophie’s ex are weak, it’s just because the movie is too nice and its romantic leads too darling to skewer even the deserving. It’s as endearing as a pop song that still makes you smile, even 20 years later.

Parents should know that this is a milder-than-average PG-13. There is very brief strong language, some sexual references, a non-explicit sexual situation, and some dancing in skimpy clothes. There is a brief reference to drug and alcohol abuse, and some comic violence, including a punch.

Families who see this movie should talk about the music they like now and liked when they were younger and what has happened to some of the performers. Why do some performers seem to re-invent themselves to change with the times or to make the times change for them while others do not?

Families who enjoy this movie will also enjoy some of the other romantic comedies featuring Grant and Barrymore, including Never Been Kissed and Four Weddings and a Funeral (some mature material). They might like to explore some 80’s pop music from groups like A Flock of Seagulls, Duran Duran, Frankie Goes to Hollywood, and Wham! For a good real-life example of the way a big star adapts a song for her own style, listen to Madonna’s song “Don’t Tell Me” and the original version, performed by the songwriter Joe Henry as “Stop” on his album, Scar. Fountains of Wayne’s Adam Schlesinger, who wrote the song for this film, had an experience a little like that of Sophie and Alex when he entered and won the competition to write the title song for That Thing You Do.

Related Tags:

Comedy Movies -- format Musical Romance

Black Snake Moan

Posted on February 3, 2007 at 3:43 pm

C-

Lowest Recommended Age:	Mature High Schooler
MPAA Rating:	Rated R for strong sexual content, language, some violence and drug use.
Profanity:	Extremely strong and crude language, n-word
Alcohol/ Drugs:	A great deal of drinking, smoking, drug references and drug use
Violence/ Scariness:	Violence, including gun, characters injured
Diversity Issues:	Diverse characters
Date Released to Theaters:	2007
Date Released to DVD:	2007
Amazon.com ASIN:	B000PY52EU

Things are not going well for Lazarus (Samuel L. Jackson). He has been living a life right out of a blues song. His wife left him. For his brother.

And now, he has found an almost-naked young woman, badly beaten, outside his house. Things have not been going well for Rae (Christina Ricci) either. She has slept with just about everyone, but the only man she has ever loved is Ronnie (Justin Timberlake) and he has joined the military. Rae is no good at being on her own, and she has an unfortunate tendency to respond to stress by drinking, taking drugs, and having sex. Lazarus lives up to his name by bringing her back to life.

His technique for doing this involves chaining her to his radiator.

It is fair to say this raises some issues — male/female, black/white, sacred/profane for example. And that, too, sounds like a blues song.

The music in the film is terrific — searing, gut-twisting wails of loss and despair. This is a film in which Samuel L. Jackson sings (well) and Justin Timberlake does not. There are some powerful moments, particularly those featuring John Cothran Jr. as a preacher named Reverend R.L. But the characters are — even by blues standards — so over the top that we never feel their connection to us or to each other. A relationship like Lazarus and Rae needs some authentic moments — a confession, exchanges of confidence, a willingness to let each other see them at their best and their worst. But we never get any of that.

The confrontation between Rae and her mother approaches a parody of the long line of Southern slattern films from Baby Doll to Temple Drake. There is nothing approaching the subtle complexity of the relationships in Hustle & Flow, the previous movie from writer/director Craig Brewer. Worst of all, it undermines Lazarus’ attempt to give Rae some dignity and sense of self-worth in its own treatment of her — and of the actress who plays her. The portrayal of Rae
‘s compulsive need for sex and of her always-perfect, always exposed little body (really little, even more troubling given Ricci’s history of anorexia) is exploitive, more trashy than steamy. Rae’s got a right to sing the blues — and this movie is just one more reason why.

Parents should know that this film has extremely mature material that may be offensive even to adults. There are very explicit sexual references and situations, including nudity and promiscuity. Characters drink, smoke, use drugs, and use very strong and crude language, including racial epithets. There is violence, including punching and guns. Strengths of the movie include the portrayal of an inter-racial friendship (with frank acknowledgement of the concerns it could raise in parts of the community) and the portrayal of a sincere and honorable religious leader.

Families who see this movie should talk about why it was important for Lazarus to try to help Rae. What is the significance of his name? Why was Rae so troubled? Why did she care about Ronnie? What is likely to happen to them?

Families who enjoy this movie will also enjoy exploring some of the work of the Southern blues artists featured on the soundtrack, including Son House’s The Original Delta Blues and R.L. Burnside’s A Bothered Mind.

Related Tags:

Comedy Drama Movies -- format Romance

Because I Said So

Posted on January 30, 2007 at 4:12 pm

I blame “Sex and the City.”

Now everyone thinks that what it takes — or all it takes — for a story about a bunch of women characters to work is non-stop talk about sex and shoes and a complete absence of boundaries. But this film is missing three key elements of “Sex and the City.” First: wit. Second: interesting, distinctive, believable characters and situations. Third: Conversations that are pleasantly racy and edgy between friends are just plain ewwwwwwwwwww when they’re between mothers and daughters.

This movie manages to be offensive and yet dull and predictable, as phony as a Kate Spade sidewalk knock-off bag and as unoriginal as the ready-for VH1 soundtrack. Does it give you an idea if I mention that there are not one, not two, but three intended-to-be-hilarious dropped cakes? And not one of them is actually funny?

With an apparent complete lack of direction and a fingernails-on-blackboard screenplay, all the talented cast can do is race around in a frenzied ditz-fest.

Diane Keaton plays Daphne the supposed-to-be-adorably ditzy, funkily chic, and hopelessly overinvolved mother of three daughters. The older two aren’t important enough for us to care what their names are, but they are played by the should-fire-their-agents-for-this “Gilmore Girls'” Lauren Graham and Piper Perabo. The youngest is Milly (Mandy Moore), also supposed-to-be-adorably-ditzy, who runs a catering service. Her mother says things to her like “Go talk to that guy, but don’t do that thing you do.”

So, what’s an interfering mother to do? The internet is just sitting there, filled with prospective sons-in-law. So, after a brief intended-to-be-humorous interlude in which Daphne gets stuck on a porn site (I hope Gateway didn’t pay for product placement), she posts a “looking for someone for my daughter” ad and soon enough has 17 would-be-suitors lined up for interviews.

And one musician named Johnny (Gabriel Macht) performing in the bar who rescues her from a volunteer therapist who shows up for an impromptu intervention. Daphne thinks she’s found Mr. Right in Jason (Tom Everett Scott), a successful architect. But the musician goes after Milly, too. Soon she’s dating them both. Two problems here: one, there is no reason to believe that Jason would have any interest in Milly, and two, Milly’s failure to be honest with either of them makes her much less sympathetic. Oh, and there’s also a child who enters the picture who makes a lot of only-in-the-movies, intended-to-be-cute-and-funny-but-completely-synthetic comments. But one of these suitors has a handsome dad (Stephen Collins) who makes Daphne think that maybe it’s her own love life she should be fixing. What she should have been fixing is this tedious, unfunny, embarrassing movie, but I’m afraid it’s as beyond repair as those three smashed cakes.

Parents should know that this movie has some crude language and extremely explicit sexual references and situations for a PG-13 movie, including mother-daughters discussions of the pros and cons of thong underwear and circumcised penises, about oral sex and numbers of orgasms. There are some scanty undies, scenes of internet porn (inspiring a dog to hump the furniture), and a brief “humorous” same-sex kiss. Characters do some social drinking and some drinking to deal with stress, loneliness, and nervousness. There is some insensitive racial and ethnic stereotyping and humor involving a possibly suicidal man in counseling that is intended to be humorous but comes across as offensive.

Families who see this movie should talk about how parents know when to step back from their involvement in their children’s lives. And they should talk about how people who care about each other handle the “off days.”

Families who enjoy this movie may enjoy some of the other (and much better) movies about mothers trying to run their daughters’ love lives, including Next Stop Wonderland and For Love or Money. The two wonderful Gary Cooper movies Daphne likes are Love in the Afternoon with Audrey Hepburn and A Farewell to Arms.

Related Tags:

Comedy Romance

Blood and Chocolate

Posted on January 25, 2007 at 11:33 am

C-

Lowest Recommended Age:	High School
MPAA Rating:	Rated PG-13 for violence/terror, some sexuality and substance abuse.
Profanity:	Some strong language
Alcohol/ Drugs:	Drinking, drug dealer
Violence/ Scariness:	Intense and graphic peril and violence, characters injured and killed
Diversity Issues:	Strong female character
Date Released to Theaters:	2007
Date Released to DVD:	2007
Amazon.com ASIN:	B000OCY7TY

There was enthusiastic applause in the theater when the name of author Annette Curtis Klause appeared in the opening credits. The book, about a teenage girl in Maryland whose werewolf issues serve as a metaphor for the sometimes-disturbing forces in adolescence, has a devoted following. But by the time the movie ended, there were only a few half-hearted claps from that same part of the theater. And the book’s fans were not the only ones who were disappointed.

The movie version’s lead is a little older (she seems to be out of school, with a job in a chocolate shop) and the location has been moved to Romania, for no particular reason.

Vivian (“ER”‘s Agnes Bruckner is a lone wolf, so to speak, regarded with some suspicion by the rest of the pack, and some jealousy, too. There’s some yadda yadda about a prophecy and her being chosen and “these are the ways of our people,” but it boils down to the fact that the leader of the pack, so to speak (Olivier Martinez, oily as always) has picked her to be his new she-wolf. Apparently, they have solved the whole seven-year-itch thing by giving the Big Bad Wolf the chance to select a new mate every seven years. But Vivian is different. The wolf pack loves to find a human to chase and kill, but she just loves to run because it makes her feel free.

Vivian meets Aiden, a human (Hugh Dancy), a graphic novelist with his own backstory, and soon he has her feeling hungry like a wolf, but only metaphorically. A couple of montages later (trying on clothes for the big date, running through fountains, looking up at the sky, all to some faux-indie music),

But wolves have strong feelings about their territory. They don’t like Vivian’s relationship with Aiden. When a confrontation with Vivian’s cousin ends in his being killed (by Aiden’s silver pendant), the young couple has to find a way to trust each other and create their own destiny.

There are a few nice touches — a falling red ribbon, an abandoned historic church, Vivian’s exuberant race through the streets. But the dialogue is weighted with dull claptrap about prophecies and “these are the ways of our people” and howlers like, “If you cared a Goddamn thing about me, you’d have left me before we even met,” the transformation scenes have no special vibrance, and Vivian’s existential angst just seems petulant. This wolf story is toothless.

Parents should know that this movie has intense and explicit peril and violence for a PG-13, including close-up shots of cuts and wounds, and fights with guns, knives, and very sharp teeth. Many characters are injured and killed. Characters use some strong language and drink and one deals drugs. There are some sexual references and there is brief non-sexual nudity.

Families who see this movie should talk about why Vivian felt responsible for her parents’ death. How did Aidan’s family background help him to understand her situation? What will happen to them? Are the wolf people cursed or blessed? Why?

Families who enjoy this movie will also enjoy An American Werewolf in London, The Lost Boys, Sleepwalkers, and Wolf.

Related Tags:

Drama Fantasy Movies -- format Romance