The Smurfs

Posted on July 28, 2011 at 9:58 am

After a promising beginning with the tart but sweet romantic comedy “Never Been Kissed,” director Raja Gosnell has been mired in the quagmire of movie junk food, “family” movies like “Scooby-Doo” and “Yours, Mine and Ours.” They are the cinematic equivalent of high sugar, high fat processed food: loud, crude, special-effects-driven, cheesy, and vacuous. His updates miss both the charm and the point of the originals. While the animated “My Little Pony” is not only back on television but it is suddenly hip, this latest version of the Smurfs combines an enchanted world of magical animated characters with live-action New York City and manages to get the worst of both worlds. It tries to appeal to kids with pratfalls, potty humor, and the substitution of “Smurf” for every possible noun, verb, and adjective. It tries to appeal to adults with pointless cameos by Tim Gunn and Joan Rivers. Gunn looks around with the disappointed expression he usually reserves for those Project Runway contestants who are an hour from deadline without an idea and Rivers delivers her one line as if she is hoping her face will look as lively as the expressions of the animated characters. It doesn’t.

The Smurfs were created by Belgian comic artist Peyo (Pierre Culliford), who came up with the idea after he and a friend joked around by substituting nonsense syllables for the words in a conversation. He created a community of magical blue creatures “three apples high” called Smurfs who have adventures, fight off the evil wizard Gargamel, and say things like “Oh my Smurf!” “Smurf-zactly!” and, heaven help us, “Smurf happens.” The film-makers are so proud of that last piece of wit they used it for the URL of the movie’s website.

Children enjoy the Smurfs because they are tiny, magical, sometimes mischievous but sweet, and able to defeat their foe, a human-sized wizard named Gargamel. Kids like being able to predict what each Smurf will do, not too challenging because each one’s name, Seven Dwarf-style reflecting his sole characteristic. (The only female Smurf is called Smurfette, because being female is all you need to know about her.) Children learn what it means to be “Greedy,” “Grouchy,” “Vain,” or “Clumsy,” from the characters with those names. And listening to the way the word “Smurf” is used in the dialog is a good introduction to the way language works.

This film takes six of the Smurfs out of their animated community, with its quaint mushroom houses and soft pastel colors. Grouchy (George Lopez), Brainy (“SNL’s” Fred Armisen), Clumsy (Anton Yelchin), the inexplicably Scottish Gutsy (Alan Cummings), Smurfette (the endearingly candy-sparkle voice of pop star Katy Perry), and elder statesman Papa Smurf (Jonathan Winters) are chased by Gargamel (Hank Azaria) and his cat Azrael, who want their magical blue essence. They are all sucked through a portal that lands them in live action Central Park.

Before they can find a way to get back home, they encounter a harried marketing executive (Neil Patrick Harris) and his pregnant wife (“Glee’s” Jayma Mays), toy store F.A.O. Schwartz, an apartment, an office, a prison yard, and many, many unfunny attempts at comedy about the words “blue” and “Smurf.” Also, in a plot twist apparently lifted from every single episode of the last two seasons of “Bewitched,” the Smurfs mess up their new friend’s advertising campaign for his imperious boss (“Modern Family” bombshell Sofia Vergara) but of course somehow it turns out for the best.

The kids in the audience enjoyed the pratfalls, laughing uproariously when Gargamel got hit by a bus, and happily squealing at the gross-out humor from a disgusting hairball, a smelly port-a-potty, and a chamber pot in the middle of an elegant restaurant. They liked seeing Harris get down with the Smurfs for a rousing round of “Rock Band.” It is good to see Smurfette get a chance to show her fighting spirit, though not so good to see her stuck with a plot line about wanting new dresses, and downright disappointing to see her have to stand on a heating vent in one of them for a Marilyn Monroe joke. This must be why Gutsy is Scottish – so his kilt can billow up when he stands on the vent, too.

The movie wants us to feel affection for the Smurfs and make fun of them, too. It is is raw and mean-spirited, with too many of the “Smurf” word substitutions more naughty than nice (“Who Smurfed?” “Where the Smurf are we?”). That’s Smurfed up.

(more…)

Green Lantern

Posted on June 16, 2011 at 9:52 am

Let’s get right down to it with the superhero essentials checklist. Cool powers? Check. Interesting villain? Check. Interesting girlfriend? Half a check. Aliens? Check. Fancy gala party? I’m not sure why that appears to be a crucial part of every superhero movie, but it’s here. Working through some angsty parental issues? Check. Special effects and action sequences? Maybe three-quarters of a check. Does the superhero outfit avoid looking silly? Half a check. Is the 3D worth it? No check.

Another month, another superhero, this time DC (home of Batman and Superman), not Marvel (home of the Fantastic Four, Iron Man, and Thor). Hal Jordan (a very buff Ryan Reynolds) is an irresponsible but irresistible rogue and a test pilot for a company that makes planes for the military. He has an on- and off relationship with the test pilot/executive daughter of the head of the company, Carol Ferris (“Gossip Girl’s” Blake Lively). When four members of the intergalactic force for peace and justice — think outer space Seal Team 6 — are killed by a creature who looks like a spider made of smoke, their special green lantern rings seek out the successors. For the first time, a human is invited to join the Green Lanterns. The alien dies, telling Hal only that he has to use the ring and lantern and say the oath. Hal tries the only oaths he can think of — pledge of allegiance, He-Man — before the ring and lantern lights up and he gets it right: “In brightest day, in blackest night, No evil shall escape my sight. Let those who worship evil’s might, Beware my power… Green Lantern’s light!“

It is fun as long as you don’t think too hard. There’s so much nattering about Will versus Fear that it could have been written by Ayn Rand and directed by Leni Riefenstahl. (Carol would be right at home with Dominique and Dagny.) The Lanterns’ power includes calling into being anything they can imagine, which undercuts any peril and dramatic tension in the big confrontations. It makes the struggle internal, one of strategic imagination and determination, not the best idea for a big special effects film. The bad guys include a nerdy scientist whose exposure to the evil smoke-spider turns him into a misshapen, anger- and jealousy-driven madman, and the smoke-spider, whose surprising connection to the Lanterns makes him even more dangerous. But it seems unfocused, overly fussy and most likely re-cut following a poor reaction to an earlier version — characters like Hal’s nephew and best friend are introduced and then disappear and Angela Bassett barely appears as a scientist. Mark Strong is a skeptical alien with a ridiculous mustache and even more ridiculous dialog, and the elders look like first-draft Yodas. And everybody has father issues. What, no one has a father who’s present and supportive? Aren’t there any mothers left? Reynolds does fine as Hal but Lively never lives up to her name, swanning around in elegant sheaths and high heels but without any of the wit or energy of Gwenyth Paltrow’s Pepper Potts. The credit sequence ends with a sneak peek at the villain for the next episode. Let’s hope they have the will to call up something a little more fearless next time.

(more…)

X-Men: First Class

Posted on June 6, 2011 at 2:47 pm

The two most interesting aspects of the X-Men are absorbingly explored in this prequel that takes us back to the childhoods of rival mutants Magneto and Professor Xavier, played in the first three films by classically trained Shakespearian actors Ian McKellan and Patrick Stewart. Professior Xavier wants to work with humans and use the evolutionary mutations that result in superpowers to promote peace. Magneto believes that the mutants are the product of an evolutionary leap forward and the sooner the humans are dispensed with, the better. While the super-powers and special effects are fun, it is this argument and the fluid loyalties of their followers is at the heart of the X-Men saga. This film takes us back to the days when the two were allies, if not friends, set in the post WWII Cold War era.

First, it gives us a glimpse of the two men as children. Magneto, then Erik Lehnsherr , is taken to a Polish concentration camp with his mother. His anger and anguish at being separated from her fuel his power to bend metal and control magnetism. He is taken to meet with a doctor who murders his mother to get him to access that power again. He is tortured to develop it further.

Charles Xavier is a British boy from a wealthy family living far from the war in Westchester, New York. His power is telepathy. And his only friend is a fellow mutant named Raven, whose natural appearance is blue and scaly but who has the power to take on any shape. Xavier (played as an adult by James McAvoy) gets a PhD in genetic mutation while Lehnsherr (played as an adult by Michael Fassbender) is exclusively focused on revenge against the doctor who killed his mother, now known as Sebastian Shaw (Kevin Bacon).

The great strength of the X-Men series is the way it taps into the feelings of all teenagers of being mutants. It is a natural part of that time of life to feel alienated and isolated, a bit horrified with the changes they are going through. Some of the best moments of the X-Men sagas are when the mutants learn for the first time that they are not alone and begin to own their strangeness and take pride in their powers. This film has a witty “outing” reference and as an origin story, it makes the most of its opportunity to show the young mutants collected by Xavier showing off for each other. The film also makes good use of its mid-century setting, hyper-accurate in the production design and slightly skewing the history to make the atomic age both a cause of the mutations and playing field for those who want a “final solution” for the human race. Lehnsherr’s views are more understandable in the context of his experiences; he has seen what happens when those who are seen as “other” are identified; they can be rounded up and killed. January Jones looks like she just walked out off the set of “In Like Flint” and her expressionless style works well for the icy Emma Frost. Bacon looks like someone who has just come from a party at the Playboy Mansion, smooth as a member of the Rat Pack in German and English. And it makes judicious use of archival footage, weaving President Kennedy’s announcements about the Cuban missile crisis into the story so effectively he might qualify for a supporting credit.

Director Matthew Vaughn gives the material a more straight-forward and conventional treatment than he did with “Layer Cake” and “Kick-Ass.” There are some sly in-jokes for the fanboys (a cameo appearance, two references to Xavier’s future baldness) but it does not have the heightened tone or self-awareness of his other work or the witty romantic fantasy of the underrated “Stardust.” Fassbender and McAvoy do their best, but he story and characters are more in service to the summer-movie special effects, which makes it fun, if not especially memorable. It is a serviceable film with moments of brightness and energy and fine performances but it never really comes alive.

(more…)

Thor

Posted on May 4, 2011 at 6:00 pm

The original Hammer is here. Thor, Norse god of thunder and lightning (and the source of the word “Thursday”), star of Marvel comics written by Stan Lee and his brother Larry Lieber and memorably illustrated by Jack Kirby, now joins his fellow Marvel superheros with his own movie franchise. Marvel pretty much has the big budget franchise assembly line working smoothly. While it does not hit the spot the way “Iron Man” did, it delivers on what it sets out to do, pleasing newcomers and fanboys as well. To say that the post-credit sequence glimpse of things to come is the best part of the film is just to say that this film meets its number one goal — to increase anticipation for next summer’s Avengers movie, where we will see the superhero all-stars working together.

Thor (Australian hunk Chris Hemsworth) is the son of Odin, King of the Gods (Anthony Hopkins in magisterial mode). In myth, Odin traded his eye for wisdom. In comic books, he lost it in battle with the Frost Giants, with whom they now have an uneasy truce. Thor has a brother named Loki. They are close, but competitive, and true to his stormy nature, Thor is impetuous and arrogant. A small incursion by the Frost Giants is squelched. Odin wants to leave it at that. Thor disobeys and takes the warriors from Asgard through a portal to fight the Frost Giants. They fight bravely, but they are overmatched, and barely rescued by Odin. Furious, Odin banishes Thor to earth, stripping him of his powers — and his mighty hammer. “That is pride and vanity talking,” he tells his son, “not leadership.”

A physicist named Jane Foster (Natalie Portman) as pretty as her name is plain, finds him as she is investigating some cosmic phenomena. As the government steps in to take over the investigation (“We’re the good guys.” “So are we.”) she begins to realize that he is more than human. And he begins to realize that the battles he left behind are following him to earth. “These are someone else’s constellations,” Jane says as she looks up at the sky.

This has all the ingredients for a superhero movie — director Kenneth Branagh (yes, that Kenneth Branagh) ably mixes the action and drama. He takes it seriously enough to satisfy the fanboys and slyly but respectfully tantalizes them with touches only they will understand — look for Jeremy Renner as Hawkeye alter ego Clint Barton and a shout-out to Tony Stark. But he makes it accessible to newcomers and adds in some humor, much of it provided by the refreshing Kat Dennings. Hemsworth has all the charm and brawn anyone could wish, and Tom Hiddleston as Loki is one of the best super-villains to hurtle through a vortex to take control of the universe. And the hammer really is extremely cool.

Stay to the very end of the credits for a glimpse of “The Avengers.” If it makes this movie feel like nothing more than a long coming attraction, it makes me glad that “Captain America” will be out soon.

(more…)

The Green Hornet

Posted on May 3, 2011 at 8:00 am

Anyone here remember Van Williams?

He was the star of the 1966-67 television series, “The Green Hornet.” But the only thing anyone remembers about the show today was the actor who played the title character’s martial arts and automotive expert sidekick, Kato: Bruce Lee. The tradition continues with this new film. Jay Chou (“Curse of the Golden Flower”) has the screen charisma, timing, and fight skills to make Kato watchable. That guy who plays the Hornet? Not so much.

In fact, the three things wrong with this movie are: Seth Rogen co-produced, Seth Rogen co-wrote, and Seth Rogen stars. Seth Rogen the co-producer and writer badly over-estimates the appeal of Rogen the performer. When called upon to play a clueless schlub, he can convey a certain shambling lack of pretension or artifice with some appeal. He was perfect as the brainless jello character in “Monsters vs. Aliens” and held his own fairly well as a secondary character in “Funny People,” “Superbad,” and “Knocked Up.” He may have some meta aspirations in casting himself as a self-indulgent and irresponsible playboy who decides to become a force for justice. But he doesn’t even make a persuasive dissolute. When he tries to do more, he loses all of the affection from the audience he ever mustered in playing guys who were better than they knew. Here is is so much less than his character believes to be and is supposed to be, he comes across as full of himself and egotistical; it’s as though his success in Hollywood and his hyphenate status have finally gone to his head. And even though he apparently recognizes his limited range by reducing the character arc to about an inch and a half; even after Britt decides to become a sort-of grown-up and a sort-of crime-fighter, Rogen the writer and Rogen the actor keep him pretty much an immature dope all the way through. It wears thin long before the movie is half over.

It also drags down the parts of the film that do work, especially Chou, whose precise, understated delivery is a nice counterpoint to Rogen’s messy stumbles. Michel Gondry (“Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind,” “Be Kind, Rewind”) has a gift for whimsy that adds visual interest. An impossibly souped-up supercar has an old-fashioned turntable for playing disarmingly retro LPs. He slices up the screen into segments resembling something between “The Thomas Crown Affair,” the opening credits of “The Brady Bunch,” and that Breck shampoo commercial about “and they they told two people and they told two people.” And he makes good use of the depth of 3D in the fight scenes. We get Kato-vision to see how he sizes up the opposition, with a clever variation later on. Oscar-winner Christoph Waltz (“Inglourious Basterds”) manages to make more of the villain than the script gives him and there’s a nice cameo from the ubiquitous James Franco (giving us time to think that he would make a great Hornet).

Rogen is falling into the Adam Sandler/Peter Pan trap, the endless boy-man, alternately wolfish toward and intimidated by girls (Cameron Diaz has the thankless role) and incapable of taking responsibility at home or at work. At one point, Kato literally puts him in a diaper. The only reason to give the audience such a mess is so we can have the fun of seeing him learn some lessons. But he never does. This is a hornet that’s all buzz, no sting.

(more…)