Morbius

Posted on March 31, 2022 at 11:57 am

C-

Lowest Recommended Age:	Middle School
MPAA Rating:	Rated PG-13 for some frightening images, intense sequences of violence, and brief Strong language
Profanity:	Some strong language
Alcohol/ Drugs:	Mind and body-altering medication
Violence/ Scariness:	Extended comic-book/fantasy peril and violence, vampires, characters injured and killed
Diversity Issues:	None
Date Released to Theaters:	March 31, 2022
Date Released to DVD:	June 13, 2022

More like “Bore”-bius, amirite?

Sorry, couldn’t help it. I don’t know if it was the absence of Marvel MCU mastermind Kevin Feige (this movie comes from Sony, which has the rights to Spider-Man and the characters from his comics) or if they’re just digging down so deep into the MCU to find new IP, I mean new characters to develop and have run out of all the good ones, or both. But whatever the reason, “Morbius,” with Jared Leto is something no superhero movie should ever be — dull. The action scenes are poorly staged and the special effects are awful. Plus, it spends much too much time on the origin story somehow without ever making us connect to the title character.

Leto plays Michael Morbius, an only-in-comics character who is severely disabled and a genius. And, of course, something of a renegade. He is so dazzlingly brilliant that he is the youngest scientist ever to win a Nobel Prize, but such a rapscallion that he waits until he is wearing white tie at the ceremony to tell the King of Sweden he is turning it down. He is in a furious race against time to find a cure for his debilitating genetic disorder. The funding for his rogue lab comes from the childhood friend played as an adult by Matt Smith (“Dr. Who,” “The Crown”). They met in a residential treatment facility run by kind-hearted doctor Emil Nikols (Jared Harris). When they first meet, young Michael dubs the new arrival Milo, though his name is Lucien, to indicate that he is just another in an endless line of young patients who die so quickly it is not worth learning their names. Nevertheless, they become friends and he continues to be known as Milo.

Their shared problem is some blood-related thing, so Morbius comes up with the idea that one way to cure it could be to combine his DNA with the DNA of the only animal that lives solely on blood, the vampire bat. What could go wrong?

This experiment is unethical, illegal, and extremely expensive. So, with Milo footing the bill, Morbius and his beautiful colleague Dr. Martine Bancroft (Adria Arjona) try the DNA mixture out on a cargo ship in international waters. Think of it as his version of a radioactive spider bite except that (1) he does it on purpose and (2) vampire bats have qualities that are generally considered to be problematic, starting with an unquenchable thirst for blood.

So Morbius is an anti-hero, which means we have to have an all-out bad guy so he will be not so bad by comparison. The film expects us, like the FBI agents played by woefully underused Tyrese Gibson and Al Madrigal that the first few murders did not matter because the people killed were not good guys, and it is only when a nice single mom gets all of the blood sucked out of her that we should care about who did it. Michael feels bad about what he did and is a scientist and wants to stop even worse things from happening, so we’re supposed to be on his side. The scientific discovery he should be focusing on is how much crime a white guy in a hoodie can get away with.

Even those who come to superhero movies just for the fights and special effects will be disappointed. The CGI is primarily used to make the faces of the two vampires go back and forth from skeletal to normal, plus some meaningless dust trails that their superpowers somehow manifest. Many scenes have drab lighting that for want of a less vampiric word, sucks the life out of the story. Matt Smith is a brief bright spot but Leto spends most of his time trying to look soulful. He says that despite the poor reviews, he’s committed to a sequel. Please, no MORE-bious.

NOTE: Stay through the credits for extra scenes.

Parents should know that this film has extended comic-book style peril and violence, including vampires, with some graphic and disturbing images. Characters use mind- and body-altering medication and strong language.

Family discussion: Why did Milo/Lucien and Michael respond to the treatment differently? Why did Michael reject the Nobel?

If you like this, try: The Spider-Man movies

Everything Everywhere All at Once

Posted on March 31, 2022 at 10:00 am

A-

Lowest Recommended Age:	High School
MPAA Rating:	Rated R for some violence, sexual material and language
Profanity:	Very strong language
Alcohol/ Drugs:	Vaping marijuana
Violence/ Scariness:	Extended fantasy-style action and peril, characters injured and killed
Diversity Issues:	None
Date Released to Theaters:	April 1, 2022
Date Released to DVD:	July 4, 2022

They aren’t kidding about the “Everything” in the title. “Everything Everywhere All at Once” is a wildly imaginative and just plain wild splintered story of metaverses, googly eyes, a weaponized fanny pack, dirty laundry, a big bagel, telepathic rocks, divorce papers, Benihana, a “Ratatouille” remix, the IRS, a dress with doll heads on the sleeves, and, as promised, it is all at once.

Michelle Yeoh finally has a role fully worthy of her as Evelyn, who in this universe is anxious, disappointed, and exhausted. She and her nebbish of a husband, Waymond (former child star Ke Huy Quan of “The Goonies” and “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom”) live above their business, a run-down laundromat. Her father, Gong (James Hong of “Blade Runner”), is visiting and she is planning a party. She worries about pleasing him. She thinks her daughter, Joy (Stephanie Hsu) is directionless. She introduces Joy’s girlfriend to Gong as her friend because she does not want him to know Joy is gay. The laundromat is being audited by a grim IRS bureaucrat named Diedre (an un-glammed Jamie Leigh Curtis, having a blast).

In the midst of Diedre’s questions about their receipts, a Waymond from another universe arrives to tell Evelyn that all of the multiverses are under attack by a villain named Jobu Tupaki and only she, of the thousands of Evelyns throughout the multiverses, can save the day. To do that, she will need to access the memories and skills of her Evelyn counterparts.

This leads to a dazzlingly kaleidoscopic adventure that is genuinely thrilling and often hilarious, sensational martial arts fights in an always-astounding array of settings, with a roller coaster of surprising twists and turns that hold up on repeated viewings. One very funny running joke is the increasingly bizarre and often gross triggers for switching to another universe. The production design is sensational, as observant and witty in the ordinary locations (it is the IRS office of nightmares) and the fantasies. Same with the costumes, especially those worn by Jobu Tupaki. All of it comes with cheeky brio and a surprising amount of heart. Ke Huy Quan is a marvel, both in the action scenes and in his seamless shifts between the different Raymonds. He is always present, committed, and completely clear about which version he is. Yeoh shows us all the Evelyns, separate and integrated, and it is a joy to see her go from drab and bedraggled to knowing and open-hearted. She begins the day saying she cannot hold one more thought in her head. She ends with the thoughts of countless Evelyns. I don’t want to give anything away about Jobu Tupaki, except to say the performance has great wit and charm.

The movie opens by taking us literally through the looking glass into a world of layers, miscommunication, and doubling even before we get to the prismatic multiverse. It ends with a sense of wholeness that makes us feel a little closer to, well, everything.

Parents should know that this movie includes very strong language and constant peril and action-style violence with many characters injured and killed.

Family discussion: What would your multiverse personas be? What unpredictable action would you take to access them? What rejections and disappointments have led you to this moment?

If you like this, try: “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon” and other Michelle Yeoh movies

Free Tickets to Sonic the Hedgehog 2! April 2 in Virginia

Posted on March 29, 2022 at 9:45 am

I am hosting a screening of “Sonic the Hedgehog 2” at Tysons this Saturday at 11 and I have 30 pairs of tickets to give away! First come, first served.
If you are among the lucky group, please come over to say hi.

The world’s favorite blue hedgehog is back for a next-level adventure in SONIC THE HEDGEHOG 2. After settling in Green Hills, Sonic is eager to prove he has what it takes to be a true hero. His test comes when Dr. Robotnik returns, this time with a new partner, Knuckles, in search for an emerald that has the power to destroy civilizations. Sonic teams up with his own sidekick, Tails, and together they embark on a globe-trotting journey to find the emerald before it falls into the wrong hands. From the filmmakers behind The Fast and the Furious and Deadpool, SONIC THE HEDGEHOG 2 stars James Marsden, Ben Schwartz as the voice of Sonic, Tika Sumpter, Natasha Rothwell, Adam Pally, Lee Majdoub and Jim Carrey returning, alongside new additions Shemar Moore, with Idris Elba as the voice of Knuckles and Colleen O’Shaughnessey as the voice of Tails.

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The Lost City

Posted on March 24, 2022 at 5:49 pm

B +

Lowest Recommended Age:	Middle School
MPAA Rating:	Rated PG-13 for violence and some bloody images, suggestive material, partial nudity and language
Profanity:	Some strong language
Alcohol/ Drugs:	Alcohol
Violence/ Scariness:	Extended peril and violence, leeches, chases, explosions, guns, many characters injured and killed
Diversity Issues:	None
Date Released to Theaters:	March 25, 2022
Date Released to DVD:	July 25, 2022

Let’s get the obvious question out of the way first thing. Yes, “The Lost City” is a lot like “Romancing the Stone,” the 1984 action/comedy/romance movie starring Kathleen Turner, Michael Douglas, and Danny DeVito. Both movies are opposites-don’t-attract-and-then-do stories about shy, bookish-but-beautiful stay-at-home romance novelists who end up on wild jungle adventures with handsome men who are not entirely heroic. Both feature colorful third leads and bad guys scary enough to make the moments of peril exciting.

And that’s a pretty great combination, isn’t it? Especially with four delectable stars at the top of the game: Oscar-winners Sandra Bullock and Brad Pitt plus Channing Tatum and Daniel Radcliffe. Do not listen to those who say that Bullock does not look like a 57-year-old. She looks like a radiantly gorgeous 57-year-old who is completely believable playing someone 20 years younger opposite a leading man who is in reality 14 years younger.

Bullock plays Loretta Sage, a widow still struggling with grief over the loss of her husband and dissatisfaction at her redirection from unsuccessful scholar of ancient civilizations to very successful author of bodice-ripper novels about a pair of very sexy Indian Jones-style adventuresome anthropologists.

Loretta’s purple prose and knowledge of the details of runes and ruins are just one reason for the books’ popularity. The other reason is the handsome, hunky, Fabio-like cover model, Alan (Tatum). He has the broad shoulders, easy charm and flowing locks the fans love. (When I say “has,” I do not necessarily mean growing from his scalp, more like, in his closet to be applied as needed.) He also has something of a crush on Loretta, though he may be confusing both of them for the characters she imagined.

Loretta, who describes herself as a “sabiosexual” (one who is attracted to intellect), thinks of Alan as a brainless pretty boy. She might be a bit jealous of his effortless appeal. She reluctantly agrees to a joint appearance to promote her new book. It does not go well. And then, as she is leaving, she gets into the wrong car and finds herself seated before a lovely array of cheeses and cold meats and an impeccably dressed billionaire who has the most indispensable of all powerful villains, a British accent. He has a clue to a lost treasure, he wants Loretta to translate it, and he won’t take no for an answer.

And so, Loretta is off to the jungle (it was filmed in the Dominican Republic), and Alan, possibly confusing himself with the hero he portrays, goes off to rescue her, with the help of his meditation teacher, a former Navy SEAL played by Brad Pitt, who is as usual the MVP as he is wherever we are lucky enough to see him. This takes nothing away from Bullock and Tatum, who are enormous fun to watch. They have great chemistry and are clearly having a blast. It’s just that Pitt is even more fun. They all get strong support from the rest of the cast, especially Da’Vine Joy Randolph as Loretta’s publisher/publicist and Patti Harrison as the social media liaison. Directors Aaron Nee and Adam Nee keep things moving so the various plot holes fly by without disrupting the popcorn pleasure of seeing Bullock get over her inhibitions and assumptions, Tatum dance, and Pitt be cool in this highly entertaining story.

NOTE: Stay for a post-credit scene.

Parents should know that this movie has extended peril and action with guns, chases, and explosions, and many characters are injured and killed. A character has to take off his clothes to have leeches removed from his body and we see some nudity. Characters use strong language and drink alcohol.

Family discussion: What do Loretta and Alan have in common? What surprised them about each other? Why does Fairfax only want what is impossible to get?

If you like this, try: “Romancing the Stone”

The Outfit

Posted on March 17, 2022 at 12:46 pm

A-

Lowest Recommended Age:	Mature High Schooler
MPAA Rating:	Rated R for some bloody violence, and language throughout
Profanity:	Pervasive strong language
Alcohol/ Drugs:	Smoking
Violence/ Scariness:	Crime-related peril and violence, characters injured and killed, guns, knives fire, disturbing graphic images
Diversity Issues:	None
Date Released to Theaters:	March 18, 2022
Date Released to DVD:	May 2, 2022

The title of “The Outfit” has a double meaning, like most of the other details in the movie. It refers to the occupation of Leonard (Mark Rylance), who makes bespoke men’s suits in post WWII Chicago. His store, with a workshop in the back, is where the entire film takes place.

Don’t call Leonard a tailor; he will correct you by explaining that anyone with a needle and thread can sew. He is a cutter, a profession that requires exquisite precision, concentration, patience, and skill. His most prized possession is his lovingly honed fabric shears. And in a world where even names are doubled and language is used to obscure, deflect, and demean, he is called “English” by his most important customers, a gangster group known as “The Outfit.”

Leonard has a pretty receptionist named Mable (Zoey Deutch), who has spent her life on the same block. She dreams of seeing the world but until then she collects snow globes of the places she hopes to see. The latest one is Big Ben. Of course Leonard has seen it and he tells her dismissively that it is just a clock. In a wonderfully-written scene they both stumble as they try to express their concern for one another.

Leonard’s first customer was Roy (Simon Russell Beale of “The Death of Stalin”), a crime boss with a taste for fine menswear. He knows that “The Row” refers to Saville Row, where the wealthiest men in the world get their understated, perfectly tailored suits. Leonard tells us that a suit is not just a jacket and trousers. It is made up of four fabrics cut into 38 separate pieces, assembled in 228 steps. And, he tells us, it is as important to know the man who will wear the suit as it is to take his measurements. We see that Leonard is a person of deliberation, careful observation, and an awareness that perfection may not be achievable, but it is worth trying to get as close as possible. And we will learn that he is a person who thinks quickly, lies persuasively, and does not
get rattled.

We in the audience are going to get rattled, though, in this expertly crafted puzzle box of a movie that all takes place in one location, with a very small cast of characters, but keeps the twists and turns coming until the last few minutes. Roy has an impetuous, hot-headed son, Richie (Dylan O’Brien), who travels with a level-headed, ruthless gangster Richie thinks is his sidekick but is really his minder (Johnny Flynn as Francis). Their competition for Roy’s respect is volatile.

It is fascinating to watch Leonard respond in the moment to the shifting loyalties and threats. Rylance, as always, is a master of the smallest gesture and change of expression. He so deeply immersed himself in preparation for the role that he worked with Saville Row tailors/cutters to create the suit he wears in the film. His scene with Beale, two master actors at the peak of their powers, is electrifying.

“The Outfit” is a promising debut for first-time director Graham Moore, an Oscar-winner for the screenplay of “The Imitation Game” and co-writer of this film as well. It is as well-crafted as the suits pieced by the expert cutter at its center.

Parents should know that this movie is about gangsters and it includes guns, knives, fire, and fights, with many characters injured and murdered and some very graphic and bloody images. Characters use strong language and smoke and there are sexual references.

Family discussion: What was the biggest surprise in the movie? What tool is important in your life?

If you like this, try: “Layer Cake” and “Confidence”