Posted on February 8, 2016 at 8:00 am
Every parent should see “Screenagers,” which explores the unprecedented challenges families face over social media, video games, academics and internet addiction. Insights from authors and brain scientists provide a context for thoughts about how to best empower kids to navigate the digital world.
Posted on January 15, 2016 at 7:00 am
Many thanks to Rawdon Messenger, CEO of TeenSafe, who answered my questions about keeping tweens and teens safe online.
At what age do most kids get their first cell phone or iPad?
The age is getting younger and younger. Pew predicts that 90% of 6 year olds will have a smartphone by 2020.
We are seeing younger children getting iPads (around 5 years) then graduating to smartphones around 10 years.
More research here.
Ten years ago, parents were most often less adept with technology than their kids. Is that still the case or are today’s parents of tweens and teens themselves young enough to be digital natives?
Kids are learning and adopting new technology faster than their parents. They are also far more socially integrated online than most parents understand. Even though most parents know what SnapChat is, they don’t really understand how to use or communicate using it. Furthermore there are so many new apps appearing that it’s hard for parents to know what’s what. We feel it is very important that parents take time to understand not only what apps their children are using, but also how they are using them. It’s a great way to connect with your child and learn from them.
How did you become interested in “blacklist apps?” What exactly are they?
There are many apps that we think simply are inappropriate for children. No parent would want their thirteen year old using dating apps where they could “hook-up” with adults or using anonymous messaging apps which are full of trolls and bullies. Parents need to be more aware of what these apps are and the dangers they can pose for our kids. They can then make the right decision as to whether to allow their children to use them.
We believe that parents must parent their children’s digital lives to the same extent they do their physical lives. Handing a child a smartphone with no restrictions or rules is irresponsible.
Who develops these apps? Where do kids find out about them?
The apps are usually developed by young entrepreneurs and, if they become popular (which they can very quickly), they often get given lots of money by financiers to grow and establish further their apps. Children learn about these apps from each other as the new cool way to connect and communicate.
How should parents talk to tweens and teens about online safety?
This is the most important thing. A parent needs to think carefully about the issues their child may face in the digital life – bullying, sexting, inappropriate content, too much screen time, distraction, etc. They also need to think about where their child is developmentally. Then talk about what they are doing with their device. Ask the about who they interact with and how? And what they think is bad behavior and how they handle it when they see it. Give feedback. It is very import to be clear about what are the big no-no’s and why.
Do you recommend any special rules or contracts for kids with their first phones?
Are schools doing a good job of informing kids about online risks?
Many schools are. They have programs on Digital Citizenship and clear rules on conduct while at school. Things get complicated as children misbehave on social media. Is it school business to monitor and guide children behavior online?
PTAs (many of whom, TeenSafe supports) do a great job organizing seminar for parents and students.
Things are evolving so fast, that it is a big challenge to understand the issues, define policy and then educate on these issues.
Do you have any data on use of these apps?
We do not track the usage of the children being monitored on our service. That data is private and is only available to the parents of the children.
Posted on January 10, 2016 at 2:02 pm
The New York Times reports that “Web Junkie,” a special to be shown January 11, 2016 on PBS, has some disturbing data for parents about the impact of screen time on children.
Excessive use of computer games among young people in China appears to be taking an alarming turn and may have particular relevance for American parents whose children spend many hours a day focused on electronic screens. The documentary “Web Junkie,” to be shown next Monday on PBS, highlights the tragic effects on teenagers who become hooked on video games, playing for dozens of hours at a time often without breaks to eat, sleep or even use the bathroom. Many come to view the real world as fake.
Chinese doctors consider this phenomenon a clinical disorder and have established rehabilitation centers where afflicted youngsters are confined for months of sometimes draconian therapy, completely isolated from all media, the effectiveness of which remains to be demonstrated.
This is consistent with the findings in Sherry Turkle’s new book, Reclaiming Conversation: The Power of Talk in a Digital Age
There is an amazing statistic that there has been a 40 percent decline in all the ways we know how to measure empathy among college students in the past 20 years and most of it in the past 10 years. That’s just an alarming number. And another fascinating experiment is that if you leave college students alone and just ask them to sit without a device and without a book for six minutes they will administer electric shocks to themselves rather than just sit quietly with their own thoughts. So there are two parallel developments: incapacity to emphasize and a lack of capacity for solitude.
I think these things go together because both of them are what you would expect if from the very youngest stages we give people a screen to go to at the moment they feel the tiniest boredom. And that’s what’s happening. There are screens for baby bouncers. There are screens on potty trainers. There are robots that will read to your child instead of you sitting and talking to your child. So when I first got into this project I was asked to consult by a middle school. It was just a regular middle school and their teachers were saying that the students were not behaving for example the way 12-year olds should behave on the playground. They were behaving more like seven and eight year olds. That is to say they were being cruel to each other and excluding each other and didn’t seem to be able to put themselves in the place of other children. They couldn’t seem to be able to imagine what other children felt like which of course is the signal accomplishment of empathy.
Posted on January 6, 2016 at 3:46 pm
Betsy Bozdech of Common Sense Media gives Cricket’s Circle some tips on determining whether your child is old enough to understand and appreciate a movie.
The most important factors to keep in mind: (1) Do your homework — just because a movie is rated PG or because you vaguely remember seeing it as a kid or because it is animated or their friends have seen it does not mean it is right for your child. (2) Know your child — just because your other child was fine with it at this age does not mean that this one will be. Remember that sometimes the greatest gift you can give your child is cover so they don’t have to be the ones to tell their friends they think it’s too scary.
Posted on December 6, 2015 at 8:00 am
It’s time for the TOADY Awards again. The most oppressive, destructive, exploitative, media-saturating, imagination-killing products on the market. The Campaign for Commercial-Free Childhood has posted the TOADY nominees, and now is your chance to vote. Will it be the spy drone? The doll who comes with her own selfie stick? The toy gun for girls that comes with matching jewelry? The info-mercial book series that teaches toddlers about brands? Or the doll that spies on your kids and can easily be hacked to let others spy on them, too?
