The Lone Ranger

Posted on July 7, 2013 at 11:32 pm

Lowest Recommended Age:	High School
MPAA Rating:	Rated PG-13 for sequences of intense action and violence, and some suggestive material
Profanity:	Some mild language
Alcohol/ Drugs:	Scenes in bar
Violence/ Scariness:	Extensive action-style violence, some graphic, many deaths and injuries
Diversity Issues:	A theme of the movie but some insensitivity to racial differences
Date Released to Theaters:	July 4, 2013
Amazon.com ASIN:	B008JFUOC2

For more than a century the movies have been telling us the story of America through westerns, and each decade gets the version it deserves. We have seen films range from the optimistic, heroic, and racially insensitive movies of the 40’s (“Destry Rides Again,” “My Darling Clementine”) to the more politically metaphoric movies of the cold war era (“High Noon,” “The Ox-Bow Incident”) to the subversive 60’s (“Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid,” “Cat Ballou”), to the bleakness of spaghetti westerns and the Oscar-winning “Unforgiven.”

And now, 110 years after Edwin S. Porter’s “Great Train Robbery” (considered the first movie western), we get an update on the radio show-turned television series-turned forgettable 1981 movie version starring model-almost-turned-actor Klinton Spilsbury and Michael Horse, “The Lone Ranger.” And it is indeed a reflection on the era of Citizens United and squestration. It is the very essence of soulless corporate excess and celebrity self-regard.

The folks behind “Pirates of the Caribbean” have reunited for a reboot of “The Lone Ranger,” but this is more like the overstuffed sequels than the fresh and charming original. Everything is out of balance in this bloated two and a half-hour endurance challenge. The worst part is that pared down to lose 40 minutes or so of filler, this could be a nice little action movie. It has the key ingredients: a story and characters that have stood the test of time, inventive and absorbing action sequences, and talented performers. Unfortunately, it is hard to find any of that in the midst of all of the bombast and overkill and tooooo many cooks.

It is now well known that Depp became a superstar with his performance as Captain Jack Sparrow in the “Pirates” movies, a performance of such quirk and weirdness that it completely freaked out the suits. So of course now, with him as producer, they let him do whatever he wanted for the character of Tonto, including spending the entire movie with his face completely painted and wearing a dead crow on his head, inspired by a picture he saw. This is when the suits should have stepped in. Instead they were enablers, allowing the quirks to become distracting and unpleasant. That is especially true in a completely unnecessary framing story set in 1933, with Depp in old man make-up appearing in an old west display, telling a little kid dressed as the Lone Ranger his story.

Armie Hammer does his best in a thankless role. His John Reid is part James Stewart in “The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance” (bookish lawyer who wants to bring Lockeian notions of a civil society to the west), part doofus. He isn’t as smart as Tonto or the villains, which is fine, but he isn’t as smart as his horse, either. He isn’t as smart as the blanket under his saddle, except when he is, or when he is called upon to do crazy stunts like racing the snow-white “spirit horse” across the top of a racing train, shooting his gun as he goes. He is a fine actor with a strong screen presence and he is clearly game. He deserves better.

The many, many references to other movies seem like crutches, not tributes. The many, many anachronisms are sloppy and show contempt for the audience, not meta-commentary. People in 1869 did not say “Let’s do this.” They did not eat hot dogs in buns with ketchup. The “Star Spangled Banner” did not become the national anthem until 1931. There was no such thing as “health code violations” in a bar — or a house of prostitution. And the all-purpose conspiracy that has the military, a hostile takeover, and an outlaw feels desperate and generic. Any commentary on today’s economic and political woes is purely coincidental.

The real commentary on the failures of capitalism is in spending $250 million of the Disney shareholders’ money on this uninspired vanity project.

Parents should know that this film has intense and graphic violence for a PG-13. A villain literally eats the heart of a man he has murdered and there is massive slaughter, with many characters injured and killed. There are prostitutes, a cross-dresser, bathroom humor, some alcohol, and mild language.

Family discussion: Why did Tonto feed the crow? Why was trading so important to him? Read the Lone Ranger’s creed and discuss how it applies to your life.

If you like this, try: “The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance,” “Silverado,” “Cat Ballou,” and “Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid”

Despicable Me 2

Posted on July 3, 2013 at 10:00 am

Is there more to the story of “Despicable Me” after Gru (Steve Carell) isn’t despicable anymore? The original, with Gru and Vector (Jason Segal) as warring super-villains, was one of the best animated films and one of the best family movies of the past several years. The characters, brilliantly designed by illustration great Carter Goodrich, were a magnificent contrast, Gru all musty gothic and Victorian, with heavy carved wood and hammered metal and Vector all sleek and mid-century Creamsicle colors. The happy ending had Gru’s heart warming to three adorable orphan girls and saving the day.

With all of that resolved, this movie never quite reaches the emotional resonance of the first, and this edition’s villain (I will try not to give away any surprises that occur after the first third of the film) is not as interesting as Vector, visually or in terms of plot or character.

But it is still wonderfully imaginative and fun, with a masterful use of 3D and breathtaking, precision-timed, action sequences that are both exciting and hilarious. And there are minions.

The adorable yellow creatures who appear to be made from marshmallow peeps and serve as Gru’s version of ooompa-loompas are even more effective scene-stealers than they were in the first outing, whether wearing a fetching maid uniform, reacting to the taste of a very bad batch of jelly, or suffering the effects of a transforming serum called PX41. Watch the end credits — they appear to be poised to take over the next chapter.

There are some new characters in this sequel, too, most delightfully Lucy, an agent for the Anti-Villain League who recruits Gru to help her save the world. She is charmingly voiced by Kristin Wiig (a different accent and a different character from the orphanage director she played in the first movie), and deliciously drawn, with Lucille Ball-red hair and a fearless but charmingly dorky personality. A local mom keeps trying to fix Gru up with her single friends and the girls want him to try a computer matchmaker. But it is Lucy who makes him consider for the first time getting over the childhood trauma that made him decide that romance was beyond his ability. Lucy is adorkable, both coltish and rubber-limbed, cheerily explaining to Gru that he should not announce his weapon until after he uses it, and then demonstrating by singing out “lipstick taser!” as he seizes and jerks on the ground.

Meanwhile, there is a new super-villain to track down. The Anti-Villain League has traced him or her to the local mall (witty and imaginatively conceived). So Gru and Lucy go undercover with a cupcake shop called Bake My Day and try to figure out which of the local merchants has the PX41. This is much more exciting than trying to make an honest living manufacturing jams and jellies, especially after the departure of his long-time aide, Dr. Nefario (Russell Brand), who leaves for evil-er pastures.

In the midst of all this, Gru still has his parental responsibilities, including some worries over oldest daughter Margo (Miranda Cosgrove), who has spotted a cute boy named Antonio (“Kings of Summer’s” Moises Arias), who has Beiberific hair and all the charm of a future Latin lover.

A chase scene that has the minions trying to protect Gru is one of the best action sequences of the year and Gru’s entry into the super-villain’s lair is cleverly designed. It is fun to see Gru try to manage a 6-year-old’s birthday party (like Steve Martin in “Parenthood,” he has to step in as the entertainment) while redefining himself as a man the girls can trust and respect. It isn’t the villain who’s his match this time, it’s his partner in non-crime. While not as liberatingly refreshing as the original, it is still a blast and one of the best family films of the year.

Parents should know that this film has several instances of potty humor and some violence and peril (mostly comic but with weapons and drug-induced personality transformations). There’s a brief shot of a bare minion tush and a joke about being drunk.

Family discussion: Why was it hard for Gru to tell Lucy how he felt? What “despicable” qualities did Gru have that helped him be a better good guy?

If you like this, try: “Despicable Me” and “Megamind”

Man of Steel

Posted on June 12, 2013 at 6:00 pm

B-

Lowest Recommended Age:	Middle School
MPAA Rating:	Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of sci-fi violence, action and destruction, and for some language
Profanity:	Mild language
Alcohol/ Drugs:	Some drinking
Violence/ Scariness:	Extensive sci-fi/action violence including acts of terrorism, characters injured and killed
Diversity Issues:	A theme of the movie, diverse characters
Date Released to Theaters:	June 14, 2013

Come on, guys, can’t you give us one superhero who is not all angsty and conflicted? Director Zack Snyder, who presided over the ultimate superhero deconstruction in Watchmen, and producer/co-screenwriter Christopher Nolan, who put the cinematic “dark” in Batman’s Dark Knight have taken the original superhero, the one all the others are a reaction to, the one who never needed to be reminded that with great power comes great responsibility, and saddled him with an existential crisis.

This is less an updating of Superman than a downgrade.

That is not the fault of British actor Henry Cavill, who plays Clark Kent and Superman with a lot of heart behind that flawlessly heroic jaw, cleft chin, and broad shoulders. It is the sour tone of the script and the drab look of the film, with completely unnecessary post-production 3D adding a greyish cast over the bleached-out images.

And a reboot really does not require yet another retelling of the origin story. We all know about the little spaceship sent off from Krypton by Jor-El (Russell Crowe) and Lara (Ayelet Zurer) before the planet exploded, and the baby who was discovered by the childless Kents, honest farmers who called their new son Clark. Here the re-telling is used to lay the foundation for a battle of former Kryptonians, with towering rage specialist Michael Shannon as General Zod (memorably played in “Superman II” by Terrence Stamp). A new wrinkle: as in Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World and “Gattaca”, the decadent, depleted Kryptonian society genetically programs fetuses for particular purposes.

In defiance of this system, Jor-El and Lara produce a child the old-fashioned way, the first such birth in generations. But it is too late. Krypton has ignored its inconvenient truths for too long. The world, including technology that features a phone that looks like a talking pomegranate, is about to end. General Zod, once Jor-El’s friend, rebels, killing Jor-El, and vowing revenge as he and his followers are sent to the Phantom Zone. (And by the way, the Phantom Zone here is not nearly as cool as the rotating glass plane in “Superman II.”

After the Kryptonian prologue, we get a distractingly disjointed story, beginning with Clark as an adult, saving the day in secret and disappearing before he can be identified. In flashbacks, we see that Martha Kent (Diane Lane) teaches him how to manage his super-senses without getting overwhelmed. Jonathan Kent (Kevin Costner) tells his adopted son not to reveal his powers because the world is not ready to understand and appreciate him. Though he loves his parents, Clark feels isolated and anguished. He cannot help stepping in when rescue is needed (and in one case when a bully needs a comeuppance), but then he has to move on so his secret cannot be uncovered.

Lois Lane (Amy Adams), spunky as ever (“What can I say, I get writer’s block if I’m not wearing a flack jacket”) finds out Clark’s secret immediately. She is not someone who is going to be fooled by a pair of glasses and a timid demeanor. Indeed, one reason this story seems so sterile is that it leaves out some of the core elements of the Superman story. No kryptonite. Instead of graceful soaring through the sky, he takes off like a jumping bean. He does not call himself Superman and is only called it once. Instead of the iconic bright red and blue uniform, he wears a textured supersuit with a dramatic but not very practical ankle-length cape. Edna Mode, where are you when Superman needs you?

Clark keeps his secret, with tragic consequences, until General Zod arrives and insists that Earth surrender its lone Kryptonian. This leads to a half-hour fight sequence that is ably staged but empty in spirit. Post-production 3D effects are applied indiscriminately, with the pores of the actors’ skin unsettlingly immersive. The action is indiscriminate and overblown. Perhaps some day we will be able to appreciate mass destruction without painful associations. But here and now, it feels gratuitous. Clark Kent/Kal-El gets so caught up in his own existential angst he overlooks some complex moral issues in his fight with Zod. The plot draws too heavily from “Star Trek” (in at least two places) and not enough from Superman’s decades of history. What about Mr. Myxlplyx? The City of Kandor? Bizarro World? Don’t make Superman into another Dark Knight. Let Superman be his own super-self.

Parents should know that this film includes extended scenes of comic book-style action violence with fights, chases, explosions, tornado, planet annihilated, sad deaths of parents, crashes, and massive city-wide destruction. Many characters are injured and killed including fetuses. There is a non-explicit childbirth scene, some strong and crude insults, and some drinking.

Family discussion: Was Clark’s father right to tell him to keep his powers secret, no matter what the cost? How does this Superman differ from other portrayals and why? Is morality an “evolutionary advantage?” What would you pick for the symbol of your house?

If you like this, try: “Superman” and “Superman II” and the new book about the teenagers who created the character of Superman: Super Boys: The Amazing Adventures of Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster

After Earth

Posted on May 30, 2013 at 6:00 pm

“After Earth” goes off the rails in the first minute as Jaden Smith (the “Karate Kid” remake, “The Pursuit of Happyness”) opens the story with a near unintelligible voice-over narration with some mishmash about how a thousand years before all humans were evacuated from Earth because the environment had become uninhabitable (critic on board so far) and then some predatory monsters evolved (still with you) who are blind but track by smelling fear (starting to lose me) and can only be defeated by “ghost fighters” who somehow are not afraid to fight them but still haven’t figured out that with all the cool technology they have invented, it might be good to have some sort of phaser-style assault weapon rather than continuing to fight them with what are basically cavemen-style spears, or technology of 20,000 years ago (critic has left the building). Will Smith has done to Jaden with this movie what Rebecca Black’s parents did to her with “Friday.” At about 50,000 times the cost.

You can see where this comes from. Will Smith is credited with the idea, and it is structured as an allegory for the wrenching moment of parenting he is at with his son, that precarious balance between wanting to protect them and needing them to have the courage, integrity, and skill to take care of themselves. Smith senior plays General Cypher Raige (these names are really over the top), a taciturn, demanding man who has spent more of his son’s life away from home than with him. Jaden Smith plays Cypher’s son Kitai, who, just as his father is returning home is notified that he has not qualified as a cadet. He is desperate to prove himself to his father, but due to a past trauma that will be revealed in great detail, is not sure of himself. Cypher decides the thing to do is to bring Kitai along on movie cliché number three, the “one last mission.” And, in movie cliché number two, something unexpectedly goes very, very wrong. And in movie cliché number one, two people who don’t know each other very well learn to respect and appreciate one another.

The spaceship crashes, everyone else is killed, Cypher is injured badly, and the only way for them to survive is for Kitai to make a very dangerous trip, by himself, to a remote location, so ET can phone home and they can get rescued. This is the part of the movie where the characters lay out the SWOT (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats), so we can see how they play out over the rest of the story. Are the little ampules for coating the lungs so Kitai can breath absolutely necessary? (Props to the foley team here; the sound these little disks make as he sucks them in are excellent.) Well, somehow Kitai will have to face a shortage. Is the holographic communications system attached to Kitai’s sleeve the only way his father can direct him to the communications disk that is their only hope of calling for help? Somehow it will have to break. And then there are the creatures “all evolved to kill humans” Kitai will run into along the way, plus various other difficulties, one requiring a “Pulp Fiction”-esque injection into the heart.

I have cherished the notion, as M. Night Shyamalan has gone from skillful, absorbing films like “The Sixth Sense” to gimmicky and increasingly self-aggrandizing claptrap (“Lady in the Water,” “The Last Airbender”) that some day we would again see his gift for cinematic storytelling. At times, he has shown an almost Spielbergian understanding of the language of film. But here, even his camera placement is pedestrian. And it is almost as though he sets out to make the worst possible use of his actors. Will Smith’s endless appeal comes from his energy and charm. All of that is tamped down here as he plays a rigid officer who cannot seem to decide if he is talking to his son or issuing orders. Jaden Smith showed himself to be a gifted performer with a nice easiness on camera, but here he is poorly directed. A far better director and a more experienced actor would have a hard time making so much time alone on screen work. Even Tom Hanks had Wilson to talk to. By the time we get to the monster, it is just a relief to know it is almost over.

Parents should know that this film includes pervasive peril and violence, human and animal characters in peril, injured, and killed, some graphic injuries and dead bodies, family member gored by scary monster, snake, spider, falls, and some disturbing images.

Family discussion: How does Moby Dick relate to this story? What do we learn from the way the characters evaluate their resources and options? Do you agree with the General’s distinction between danger and fear?

If you like this, try: “Enemy Mine”

Related Tags:

Action/Adventure Science-Fiction

Fast & Furious 6

Posted on May 23, 2013 at 6:01 pm

The storylines of the “Fast and Furious” franchise may be preposterous, but what’s even harder to believe is that, contrary to the history of just about every other multi-sequel series and what I thought were the laws of nature, these keep getting better. There’s something of a pattern at this point. Our happy gang of outlaw car racers gets into mischief of one kind and another in one movie, and then in the next the government asks them to take on some big bad guy in exchange for expunging their records. This being an even-numbered entry, it’s expunging time again as the gang, a Benneton ad of gorgeous and racially diverse people with a love for fast cars and a habitual narrow-eyed facial expression that either says, “Don’t even think of trying to mess with me” or maybe “I’m trying to remember which episode we’re on, but it probably doesn’t matter.” The talking part (I can’t bring myself to elevate it to the term “dialog”) is basic and repetitive. Anyone who’d like to liven it up with a drinking game will do very well going for either the word “family” or some variation of “that’s who we are.”

In the classic mode of motley crew of outsider stories from “The X-Men” and “The Avengers” to “The A-Team” and “The Bad News Bears,” the “Fast and Furious” movies are about a self-made family comprising people with a range of very special skills, including martial arts, weapons, tactics, interpersonal communications, technology, and banter. At the center are Dom (Vin Diesel) and his sister Mia (Jordana Brewster), now blissfully married to Dom’s one-time nemesis-turned BFF, one-time cop-turned-outlaw Brian (Paul Walker). These guys are very, very good at making law enforcement go bad.

In the last episode, our gang took a lot of money from a very bad man. Now they’re enjoying their money in highly photogenic and conveniently extradition-free locations. But then another very bad guy (with an English accent, so we know he’s both smart and evil) is stealing the component parts to some very important something or other and must be stopped. He’s far to smart for Interpol, so it’s time to get the band back together.

But it’s really all about the stunts, and there are some lulus, expertly staged by returning director Justin Lin. There is so much going on at the same time that it gets a little confusing, but you can’t miss the wow moments . There are even a couple of OMGs and a did-I-just-see-that or two. The one thing about which there will be no suspense is who they’ll be facing in #7 — just stick around for the credits.

Parents should know that this film features non-stop action with chases, explosions, shooting and fights, characters in peril, injured and killed, some strong language including one crude epithet, and drinking.

Family discussion: Do you have a code? What is it? How do we decide who counts as family?

If you like this, try: The first five “Fast and Furious” movies and – to prepare for #7 – the “Transporter” series

Related Tags:

Action/Adventure Series/Sequel