Instant Family

Posted on November 15, 2018 at 5:04 pm

B +

Lowest Recommended Age:	Middle School
MPAA Rating:	Rated PG-13 for thematic elements, sexual material, language and some drug references
Profanity:	Some strong language
Alcohol/ Drugs:	References to drug abuse
Violence/ Scariness:	Tension and some peril and accidents, brief disturbing images of injuries, family confrontations, issues of foster care
Diversity Issues:	A theme of the movie
Date Released to Theaters:	November 16, 2018
Date Released to DVD:	March 4, 2019

An adoptive mom explained to me once that most couples who adopt have “a drag-er and a drag-ee.” That can be the essence of a good partnership; parenting in any form is one of life’s greatest leaps into the unknown and it makes sense to talk it out thoroughly while understanding that no one can ever understand the terror, the exhaustion, the way children “push buttons you didn’t know you had,” and of course the unparalleled joy of being a parent until you get there, by which time you are probably too terrified, exhausted, and, yes, filled with joy to understand it even then. That is why we gravitate to movies like “Instant Family.” They give us a chance to think about how much our families mean to us.

“Instant Family,” based in part on the real-life story of writer-director Sean Anders, tells us everything we need to know about Pete (Mark Wahlberg) and Ellie (Rose Byrne) in the first scene, as they race through a decrepit mess of a house thrilled at the possibilities only they can see. Their optimistic vision and instinctive teamwork will be needed when a half joking remark about adopting an older child to catch yup with their contemporaries leads Ellie to start looking at websites about foster parenting and then to being the drag-er to Pete’s drag-ee. “This is what we do! We see potential in things and fix them up!” But of course, as someone said, adults do not make children; children make adults. The parents get some fixing up, too.

After some foster parent training, they go to a “foster fair,” to meet some of the children who are available. They were not planning to foster a teen, but they are drawn to a remarkably self-possessed girl named Lizzy (Isabela Moner) (and a bit intimidated by her, too). The social workers (Tig Notaro and Octavia Spencer) tell them she has two younger siblings. They are daunted by the idea of going from zero kids to three all at once, but understand the importance of keeping them together and cannot resist their adorable photos. The next thing they know, they are calling out, “Kids! Dinner is ready!” and wondering whether it will be reassuring or intrusive to kiss them goodnight.

You can tell Anders (“Daddy’s Home”) has been through it and has spent time with other foster families. The film has well-chosen details of the two steps forward-one step back relationship with the children, especially Lizzie, who is used to taking care of her brother and sister herself and still hopes that their mother will come for them. It is frank about the issues of fostering children of different ethnicities, the ambivalent feelings about the possibility of the biological mother returning, and the moments when Pete and Ellie wonder if they’ve done the right thing, and if not loving the children immediately makes them horrible people. Ellie says at one point that she feels like she is babysitting someone else’s kids. And she’s right. They don’t become hers because a social worker says so or because a judge says so. They become hers because she does not give up. And because she fights for Lizzie. And because she brushes Lizzy’s hair so gently and lovingly.

Wahlberg and Byrne are perfectly cast and the tone and pacing are exactly right for depicting family life, where tears are mixed with laughter and laughter is mixed with tears. They are hilariously funny and also touching and moving. There’s great support from Notaro and Spencer and from Margo Martindale as a feisty grandmother, and Moner is excellent as Lizzy whether she’s being defiant, manipulative, protective, or vulnerable. This story could have been cloying or it could have been soap opera. But Anders and his cast make it into a genuinely heartwarming experience that makes us wish we could be part of their family, too.

Parents should know that this is a warm-hearted comedy that is frank about some of the issues presented in foster parenting and adoption including trauma and neglect, drug abuse, predatory behavior and sexting, with some strong language.

Family discussion: What were the biggest challenges Pete and Ellie faced and how well did they deal with them? What is the best way to help kids in the foster program?

If you like this movie, try: “Room for One More” with Cary Grant and his then-wife Betsy Drake

True Story

Posted on April 16, 2015 at 3:20 pm

A reporter in disgrace for fabricating details of a story sits across the table from an orange-jumpsuited prisoner, accused of murdering his wife and three children. They have more in common than either of them expected. They are both outcasts. They are both unable or unwilling to explain their actions.

And they both used the name Michael Finkel. The reporter was given that name at birth and it appeared on the byline of his stories in the New York Times Magazine, including the one that cost him his job and his reputation. The man who murdered his family used that name when he fled to Mexico to escape capture. The real Michael Finkel, in seclusion at his home in Montana following his humiliating dismissal, got a phone call when the murderer was arrested, asking him for comment. With nothing else to do, and with the thought that this might be the kind of big story that get him back to a job in journalism, the real Michael Finkel, or as real as sometime just fired for lying can be (Jonah Hill), drove to Oregon to visit the man who was accused of killing his family. His real name, by the way, was Chris Longo (James Franco).

Co-writer/director Rupert Goold has a lot of ideas to explore in this film, and some work much better than others. The focus should be on the parallels between the two men, what links them, the ways they tried to use each other, and the resentments and differences that separate them. But Goold wastes Felicity Jones (“The Theory of Everything”) as Finkel’s girlfriend, with distracting diversions like an ominous shot of her running (for exercise) through the woods. She does as well as possible with a scene where her character confronts Longo, but it is artificial and stagey.

Franco perfectly captures the superficial charm that occasionally slips to reveal fierce underlying anger and self-justification. Hill is a bit out of his depth, or more likely the Finkel character is underwritten. We should be able to see his anger and self-justification, too. And he is lost in the scene where he is grappling with a moral dilemma or trying to consider the rights of anyone but himself. He is better at showing us Finkel’s arrogance and his need for approval. When Longo says he took Finkel’s name because he was a fan, Finkel is unabashedly complimented. After his humiliating dismissal, he gravitates toward approval like a moth toward a flame. And we know how that turns out.

The ironic title reminds us that we can never really know the true story; there are always too many conflicting versions, too much that is just unknowable. And yet the difference between Finkel, who violated the most fundamental principles of journalism by combining the details of the Africans he met to tell it as a story about one individual, and the movie of his own story is that fiction is supposed to convey larger truths. It is not at all clear that this one does.

Parents should know that this film concerns the murder of a wife and children. There are some disturbing and grisly images, as well as child slavery and discussion of beatings, deception, some strong language, and drinking.

Family discussion: Why did Jill visit Chris? How did Chris and Mike try to con one another and who was most successful?

If you like this, try: “Capote” and “The Jinx” and Finkel’s book, Murder, Memoir, Mea Culpa

The Real Story: True Story with Jonah Hill and James Franco

Posted on April 15, 2015 at 3:46 pm

“True Story” opens this week, starring Jonah Hill and James Franco. It is based on the real-life experiences of a disgraced journalist and the murderer who took his name.

The movie is about a reporter fired by the New York Times for fabricating part of his story with an important connection to a man he has never met, a murderer who killed his wife and children. The name they share: Michael Finkel.

Michael Finkel was the name given by the murderer when he was arrested. By then he was on the FBI’s Ten Most Wanted List after he fled the country.

Finkel was not his real name, which is Christian Longo. When the real Finkel found out Longo was using his name, he wanted to know why. One reason was his natural curiosity as a journalist. Another was the spookiness of it. And another was his sense, or at least his hope, that this was a story that could be his ticket back to a career in journalism. But who was using whom? Who was the bigger liar?

Finkel wrote a book about his experiences called Murder, Memoir, Mea Culpa. And now it is a movie starring Jonah Hill and James Franco.

CBS News told the story on “48 Hours” in 2005.

“Mike was empty. He was a little lost,” says Barker, Finkel’s ex-girlfriend at the time. “Mike was not sure who he was. And Chris came along, the timing was perfect. He just came along at the right time and a real relationship developed.”

Finkel adds, “He was the only friend or person in my life to whom I felt morally superior,” says Finkel.

Years later, on death row, Longo called Finkel to ask for a favor. As Finkel explained in Esquire magazine, Longo was influenced by the movie “Seven Pounds” and wanted to set up a program for organ donation by prisoners scheduled for execution. This contact led Longo, for the first time, to tell the real story about the murders, at least what he could tell. “I can’t remember who I killed first,” he explained to the man whose identity he tried to take. Finkel wrote of this encounter:

It’s never been easy to say how I feel about Longo. I’ve been tugged, from the start, between revulsion and fascination, between hoping to know the truth and wanting to imagine that Longo couldn’t actually murder his own family. But after hearing this story, there was no doubt. Hate seems too flat a word, too glib, but that is what I felt. I hated the crime, I hated hearing about it, thinking about it, imagining it, and I hated the person who did it. And it was the worst kind of hate, too, because it really didn’t matter.

Related Tags:

The Real Story

Trailer: True Story with James Franco and Jonah Hill

Posted on January 7, 2015 at 3:52 pm

James Franco and Jonah Hill star in “True Story,” a title with layers of meaning. It is based on the real life story of reporter Michael Finkel (Hill), who was fired because he fabricated and altered facts in a “true story” he wrote for the New York Times. And then he discovered that a murderer (Franco) had been living his own version of a “true story,” representing himself as “New York Times reporter Michael Finkel.” Finkel’s book, True Story: Murder, Memoir, Mea Culpa, is the basis for this film, which co-stars Felicity Jones (“The Theory of Everything”), Gretchen Mol, and impressive newcomer Genevieve Angelson. It will be showing at Sundance later this month.

Won’t Back Down — The Real Story

Posted on September 27, 2012 at 3:54 pm

This week’s feel-good movie “Won’t Back Down” is the “inspired by a true story” saga of a mother and a teacher who worked together to take over a failing school in Pennsylvania. Maggie Gyllenhaal and Viola Davis star as the women who got the support of the other parents and teachers despite the opposition of the teachers union. The movie has created a lot of controversy on all sides for its portrayal of the teachers union as interested only in job security, hours and pay for teachers and not what is best for their students and willing to resort to threats, bribery, and character assassination to maintain their power. A quote often attributed to real-life teachers union president Albert Shanker (“When schoolchildren start paying union dues, that’s when I’ll start representing the interests of school children.”) is used in the movie even though there is no record of his having said it. It is documented, however, that he said, “It is as much the duty of the union to preserve public education as it is to negotiate a good contract.” (Fans of the Woody Allen movie “Sleeper” may remember that there is a joke about Shanker getting a bomb.)

The Center for Media and Democracy’s PR Watch is very critical of the film because they say it is funded by businesses with a hidden agenda — to get parents to use “trigger laws” to get rid of the unions and administrations at under-performing schools so that private businesses can take over and make a profit. Families who view the film should find out how “trigger laws” work in their own community and what standards are being applied in their own school systems for evaluating proposals to improve the students’ experience and results.

Related Tags:

The Real Story