Armageddon

Posted on December 13, 2002 at 5:16 am

The summer thrill ride movie is becoming as much of a 4th of July tradition as the picnic and the fireworks, and the 1998 version is “Armageddon,” the second movie of the year about a meteor headed toward earth. While the plot line is predictable (think “Dirty Dozen” crossed with “The Right Stuff”) and concocted almost by recipe (take one tough but lovable hero — Bruce Willis in his “Die Hard” mode — and add in a lovably diverse group of misfits, then wisecracks to taste and just a touch of sentiment and a dash of young love for seasoning), the 10-14 year olds in your household (and the 10-14 year old in many of us) will find that it delivers as a summer explosion movie. Parents should know that there are a few sexual references (one major conflict is that the main character’s daughter is sleeping with one of his men) and some strong language, but it is the intensity of the action that is the real cause of the PG-13 rating. Parents should also note that several major characters die. The age recommendation is only for kids who enjoy that kind of roller-coaster style excitement. Families should also discuss some of the moral questions that arise as people have to take risks and make sacrifices for the greater good.

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Action/Adventure Science-Fiction

Down to You

Posted on December 13, 2002 at 5:16 am

Teenagers, especially teenage girls, may want to see this movie, a romantic comedy staring teen dreams Freddie Prinze, Jr. and Julia Styles. Parents need to know that it contains material that they may consider inappropriate, including several explicit sexual references that are well into R territory, despite the film’s P-13 rating.

For example, the movie opens with one character bragging about his success as a porno star and then making a bet with another character about whether he can find a girl who will have sex with him that night. He does, and then freaks out because she does something in bed that he has not previously done, as he explains, in tears, to the leading man. All of this occurs in the first ten minutes. The main couple’s less than completely successful first sexual encounter is shown. A character attempts suicide over a broken heart, a serious issue poorly handled. Furthermore, the characters, college students for most of the story, drink and smoke constantly and use drugs. A character drives while drunk and crashes the car.

Somewhere in all of that, there is a sweet story about two college kids who fall in love and find more than they are able to handle. The movie shows us that they get into trouble for trying to take on an adult relationship without the emotional maturity it requires. They break up because they are not capable of talking to each other honestly about their fears. When they have a pregnancy scare, they realize that they are not prepared for the consequences of their actions. Desperate for a separation to give her space to grow up, the girl breaks up with the boy the only way she can think of — by having sex with someone else.

Parents of kids who see this movie should use it as an opportunity to talk about the choices that are available to kids when they leave home to go to college, including the choice of friends, romantic partners, alcohol and drug use, the decision to have sex, decisions about classes and careers, and how they make those choices.

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South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

Posted on December 13, 2002 at 5:16 am

Parents may think that nothing can be more outrageous than the “South Park” television show, with its macabre humor, strong language, and singing poop. They need to understand that this theatrical release is much, much more outrageous and inappropriate for children and most teens.

Art imitates life, as the plot has its quartet of third graders sneaking into a Canadian R-rated movie and repeating the profanity they heard. This becomes so upsetting to the community that the US declares war on Canada. One of the children gets a V-chip implanted in his head that shocks him when he says something inappropriate. And Kenny, killed once again, ends up in Hell, where Satan and Saddam Hussein are homosexual lovers.

The movie has some sharp satire and genuine wit amidst the over 100 uses of the f-word and references to every kind of bodily function and singing sex organs. But any parent considering allowing a child or teenager to see the movie should watch it first, as it is much raunchier and more explicit than anything else the child (or, for that matter, the parent) is likely to have seen.

Tom Thumb

Posted on December 13, 2002 at 5:16 am

The fairy tale about the boy no bigger than a thumb is brought to life with former gymnast Russ Tamblyn as the title character. Tom is as irresistibly charming as his “Very Own Song,” one of many charming musical numbers. Fiendish villains Terry Thomas and Peter Sellers try to get the tiny boy to steal for them, but watching over tom is a good fairy. Watching over the good fairy is the handsome woodsman whose kiss can turn her into a mortal. Without giving anything away, it is fair to say they all live happily ever after, at least those who deserve to!

Fly Away Home

Posted on December 13, 2002 at 5:16 am

Amy, a 13-year-old girl from New Zealand (Anna Paquin), wakes up in a hospital bed after an automobile accident to see her father, Tom (Jeff Daniels), whom she barely knows. Her mother was killed in the crash, and she must go back with him to his remote farm in Canada. He is an eccentric sculptor and inventor, preoccupied with his work and unsure of how to try to comfort her. Amy does not want to be comforted, and wanders silently through the marshes. When developers illegally mowing down the marsh kill a goose, Amy finds the eggs she left behind, and begins to resolve her loss by mothering the goslings. Since she is the first thing they see when they hatch, they “imprint” her, and think of her as their mother, following her everywhere, even into the shower. The local authorities insist that their wings be clipped, since without their mother they cannot learn to migrate, and will cause problems for the community when they try to fly. But Amy and her father will not allow the geese to be impaired.

Tom devises a way for Amy to play the role of “Mother Goose” in teaching the geese to migrate, by learning to fly herself, in an ultralight plane, and leading them south. With Tom’s brother (Terry Kinney) and girlfriend (Dana Delany), they plot a course to a wetland preserve that is scheduled to be developed unless geese arrive by November 1. As they work together, Amy finds a way to begin to heal her loss of her mother and her relationship with Tom.

This is a thrilling adventure, exquisitely told, by the same director and photographer who made “The Black Stallion”. Ballard has the patience to let the story tell itself, and the quiet moments are breathtakingly beautiful and heartbreakingly touching. PARENTAL NOTE: There is one profanity in the movie, demanded by the studio, who insisted that the movie must have a PG rating so that it would not scare off school-age kids. Of more concern to many parents will be Amy’s nose ring, inserted with Tom’s approval.