Anaconda

Posted on December 24, 2025 at 6:15 pm

Lowest Recommended Age:	High School
MPAA Rating:	Rated PG-13 for violence/action, strong language, some drug use and suggestive references
Profanity:	Strong language
Alcohol/ Drugs:	Drinking and drug use (played for comedy)
Violence/ Scariness:	Extended peril and violence, guns, explosions, scary giant snakes
Diversity Issues:	None
Date Released to Theaters:	December 25, 2025

If you are in the mood for a movie that is self-aware but still cheerfully and unapologetically stupid but in a very funny way, I’ve got good news. “Anaconda” is here.

You may wonder if this is a remake of a legendarily cheesey 1997 creature film called “Anaconda,” and the answer is, sort of, part reboot, part meta-commentary. If you have no idea that there even was a movie starring Jon Voight, Jennifer Lopez, Ice Cube, Owen Wilson, Danny Trejo, and Eric Stoltz, consider yourself lucky and don’t worry about it because everything you need to know to appreciate this film will be recapped for you as the four main characters talk about why they want to do a remake/update. And by the way, if you have never seen the 1997 version, this one might just inspire you to give it a try.

The four main characters, friends since childhood, are Doug, a wedding video photographer who would rather be making something more challenging (Jack Black), Griff, a Hollywood actor better described as unsuccessful rather than struggling, though he was in three episodes of “SWAT” (Paul Rudd), Kenny, once fired by Doug as a videographer because he was high (Steve Zahn), and Claire, a recently divorced lawyer looking for something to feel excited about (Thandiwe Newton, sadly underused as essentially the Wendy to the Lost Boys of the group). Griff tells the group he has obtained the rights to the 1997 “Anaconda” and proposes a 3-week shoot in the Amazon rainforest with him as star and Doug as director.

All four are at that mid-life point where they need to feel that they have not given up their dreams and so, with a screenplay by Doug and some modest financing from Claire, they are off to the rainforest. There they meet up with a snake wrangler named Santiago and his beloved anaconda, Heitor, and set off to film, having no idea that Ana, the person driving the boat (Daniela Melchior), is on the run from some scary-looking guys.

That’s the set up for a lot of meta-jokes about filmmaking, the process and the business, as well as various antics as many things go wrong in making their film, Ana’s pursuers keep pursing, and, perhaps needless to say, there are actual anacondas, well, CGI, but in the world of the movie, these are what Jon Voight called in the first film, “perfect killing machines” that “hold you tighter than your true love. And you get the privilege, of hearing your bones break before the power of embrace causes your veins to explode.”

The action and comedy, much of it extremely silly, are well balanced and keep things moving briskly. I might come down on the side of a little less carnage, but perhaps that is taking this more seriously than it is fair to expect of us. And some surprises near the end and during the credits are genuine delights.

Parents should know that this movie includes extended peril and violence including scary giant snakes, guns, and explosions. Characters are injured and killed. It also includes alcohol, drugs (portrayed for humor), and some strong language.

Family discussion: What project would you like to do with your friends? If you made a movie together, what would it be about?

If you like this, try: the original “Anaconda” film and “Tropic Thunder”

TRON: Ares

Posted on October 7, 2025 at 1:44 pm

B-

Lowest Recommended Age:	Middle School
MPAA Rating:	Rated PG-13 for violence and action
Profanity:	Brief strong language
Alcohol/ Drugs:	None
Violence/ Scariness:	Extended fantasy/sci-fi peril and violence, sad deaths of family members
Diversity Issues:	None
Date Released to Theaters:	October 10, 2025

The latest in the series about sentient characters in a digital world follows in the tradition of its two predecessors: the creativity is in the visuals, with very little in the storyline, and almost none in the characters and dialogue. The visuals are excellent, though, so if you see it, make sure to see it in IMAX.

The original “TRON” (1983) was inspired by the video games that were captivating a new generation (indeed, the video game it inspired out-grossed the film). Like its sequel, “TRON: Legacy” (2010), it took place mostly in a digital world. This movie, reflecting the cultural impact of the technologies that move much faster than we can comprehend or control them, shows us the wall between “real” and virtual is dissolving.

It begins with glimpses of various news broadcasts reporting on the developments at two huge software companies. One is ENCOM, where Jeff Bridges’ character Kevin Flynn worked in the earlier films. It was then led by the benign, public-spirited Kim sisters, who wanted to use technology to feed people, cure diseases, and “uplift humanity.” The other is Dillinger Systems, recently taken over by Julian Dillinger (Evan Peters), grandson of the founder (the bad guy in the original film). Julian wants to use technology to create weapons, including AI soldiers who are vastly more capable than any human, and, this is a key value proposition, “100 percent expendable.” The enemy “kills” one? We’ll sell you more! And why not make these soldiers not just humanoid, but gorgeous humanoids? Thus, the sample AI-soldiers look just like Athena (Jodie Turner-Smith) and Ares, played by Jared Leto, who says that the original film transfixed him when it first came out, and is a producer of this film

There’s just one problem that Julian manages to keep from the world leaders at his demo. The soldiers collapse into ash-like piles of code after just 29 minutes. If he is going to conquer the world, he needs to find the “permanence” code he suspects ENCOM has discovered. His mother, Elisabeth (a wasted Gillian Anderson) tries to warn him that he is being reckless, but he will not listen.

Meanwhile, Eve Kim (Greta Lee) is in fact discovering that code with the help of her assistant, Seth (Arturo Castro), on floppy disks left in a remote outpost by her late sister. Julian sends Ares and Athena to steal the code as characters — and code — go back and forth between the digital and analog worlds.

The visuals from production designer Darren Gilford) are dazzling, especially the motorcycles, ultra-modern and OG, the visualization of the cyber-heist, the action conflicts, the ribbons of light and a very cool winged flying contraption, though another flying thing that looks like something between goal posts on a football field and the Arc du Triomphe seems more dramatic than aerodynamic. The sound design is excellent, thanks to supervising sound editor Baard H. Ingebretsen and the whole sound department. The score from Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross is also first-rate, as we expect from the impressively versatile Oscar winners.

It is frustrating to see this movie almost approach some of the real and fascinating questions of AI and then swerve away for yet another “Pinocchio” story about what makes a real boy, much more thoughtfully and provocatively explored in films like “Blade Runner,” and, in a way, by every movie because they are all about what makes us most human: love, compassion, curiosity, humor, the quest for making things better. I was much less interested in whether Ares would develop feelings beyond vocabulary than I am in what we do about characters like Julian, who are unconstrained by norms, or concern for anyone but himself. The script equivalent of the 29 minute AI soldier collapse is giving Julian and his mother less depth than an 8 bit NPC. Eve, Seth, and Ajay (Hasan Minhaj) are not much better, and it is truly a shame to see this exceptional performers given so little to work with. I mean, Tilly Norwood could have handled this just as well, which is a reflection on her limitations, not her capacity.

That includes dialogue like “Maybe there is something wrong with me.” “Maybe there is something right with you.”

I did laugh at Ares’ appreciation for Depeche Mode. This is an entity made from data who has absorbed every bit and byte of information since the world began including all of Eve’s text messages, and what Ares likes is the ineffable pull of 80s British synth-pop? (He manages a kind word for Mozart.)

Jeff Bridges does show up in beatifically magisterial and most welcome mode, playing a Wizard of Oz-like figure (Julian’s interface is strongly reminiscent of the fake Oz in the MGM version), reminding us that there are some things AI cannot match. So far.

Parents should know that this movie includes extended fantasy/sci-fi peril and action with some violence and two sad deaths of family members. There is brief strong language.

Family discussion: Who should monitor and control AI? If you went into the digital world, what would you do? Why did Ares say once was enough?

If you like this, try: the other “Tron” movies and the “Blade Runner” films

Ne Zha II

Posted on August 21, 2025 at 5:26 pm

Lowest Recommended Age:	4th - 6th Grade
MPAA Rating:	Not rated
Profanity:	Some schoolyard language
Alcohol/ Drugs:	Characters take magic pills
Violence/ Scariness:	Extended peril and violence, sad deaths of parents and brother, images of a destroyed village with charred remains, scary monsters
Diversity Issues:	None
Date Released to Theaters:	August 15, 2025

I’m not going to spend much time on the storyline of “Ne Zha !!” because it is extremely convoluted and because it is not really that important. “Ne Zha II” is a sequel, continuing the saga based on the Investiture of the Gods book written during the Ming Dynasty (1368-1644), itself based on folklore, myth, and real-life historical characters. The first film is now on Netflix. I’m not sure it will clear things up for you, though, unless you already have some familiarity with the underlying stories told over generations. I overheard some older Chinese-Americans in the audience laughing as they admitted they remembered hearing the stories as children but had a hard time muddling through the first film.

That doesn’t matter too much, as long as you can figure out who the good guys are and why they are fighting the bad guys, because you will be spending most of the time looking at what’s best in this film, the spectacular and stunning background and secondary character visuals, especially the monsters. The design of the main characters is not close to that level, the voice talent other than Oscar-winner Michelle Yeoh, is lackluster, and the convoluted storyline becomes more distraction than narrative.

The two characters at the heart of the story are the impish child demon Nezha (Yanting Lü) and the more mature Ao Bing (Mo Han). They were created together as a Chaos Pearl, birthed from the primordial essences of heaven and earth. In the first movie, they joined forces and their bodies were dissolved. As this one begins, Nezha’s teacher, the immortal Taoist deity Taiyi Zhenren (Jiaming Zhang), portrayed here as a foolish but devoted character, is creating new bodies for them from the petals of the sacred lotus, a difficult process that almost immediately goes wrong when Ao Bing’s still very fragile body is destroyed. Because it takes a while to re-create the lotus petal material for bodies, Ao Bing’s soul will dissolve unless he can find a temporary host, so Taiyi puts him inside Nezha’s body.

This leads to some complications as Taiyi takes the combined boys to get the potion needed to give Ao Bing a new body. The boy(s) will have to pass a series of tests to be given the potion by Wuliang (Deshun Wang), Taiyi’s brother. Brother and father-son relationships are very important in this story.

Taiyi gives Nezha pills to put him to sleep and let Ao Bing’s powers take over to pass the tests. Meanwhile, various conflicts and reunions happen with many other characters. And many, many fight scenes, one with a funny exchange involving characters disguising themselves as each other and — an issue everyone can relate to — the inability to remember a password.

NOTE: Stay for the credits for an extended extra scene that is one of the film’s best moments.

Parents should know that this film includes extended fantasy-style peril, action, and violence, with monsters. Characters are injured and some are killed, including beloved parents and a beloved young brother and family members who sacrifice themselves and an entire village burned down, with dead bodies turned to ashes. There are a few schoolyard-style bad words and some graphic potty humor and gross-out moments. Characters take pills to manipulate their powers.

Family discussion: Nezha is given an impossible choice. What should he have done? Were you surprised at who the villain turned out to be?

If you like this, try: the first film

The Naked Gun

Posted on July 30, 2025 at 5:21 pm

B +

Lowest Recommended Age:	Middle School
MPAA Rating:	Rated PG-13 for crude/sexual material, violence/bloody images and brief partial nudity
Profanity:	Some strong language including the r-word
Alcohol/ Drugs:	Alcohol
Violence/ Scariness:	Comic/action peril and violence, guns, murder, dismemberment, crotch hits
Diversity Issues:	None
Date Released to Theaters:	August 1, 2025

“The Naked Gun” reboot comes from a dream team ideally situated to reboot the sublimely silly 1980s franchise. Liam Neeson fits perfectly into the Leslie Nielson tradition as a Hollywood-handsome dramatic actor fearless about looking ridiculous. And The Lonely Island’s Akiva Schaffer is just right as a co-writer and director who goes pedal to the metal, respecting the original when it comes to the non-step goofiness but wasting no time on respecting what doesn’t deserve it (see the OJ joke in the trailer).

As anyone familiar with this franchise knows, the plot barely matters and the characters exist just to deliver all of the sight and verbal gags. It’s just one absurd joke after another, and I don’t want to spoil them, so this will be a bit vague.

Neeson plays the son of Nielson’s character, Frank Drebin, Jr., wanting to live up to the record and values of his dad. The film opens with a bank robbery by a gang with a lot of guns. I won’t spoil Drebin’s trick for getting into the bank, but I will say it sets the tone, along with the real purpose of the robbery, not the cash but a gadget in one of the safe deposit boxes, clearly labeled “PLOT DEVICE.”

The villain in this story is Richard Cane, an entirely imaginary, I’m sure, tech billionaire whose company happens to make self-driving electric vehicles. Danny Huston is also perfectly cast as the superficially charming sociopath who plans to reboot society by unleashing humanity’s most savage instincts until only the alphas survive. Basically, he wants to unplug civilization and plug it in again. His company is meaningfully named Eden Tech, with “technologies to rival the gods.”

Pamela Anderson is more than game as Beth Davenport, sister of a murdered man connected to Cane and who may also be connected to the bank robbery. At one point, she gets up to scat sing a jazz number. That is really her singing. She is surprisingly tuneful and also hilarious. When Drebin tells her to take a chair, she doubles down on the pun with the insouciantly businesslike way she drags it out of the room. CCH Pounder is excellent as always as the tough police chief with a sleepy husband.

Nothing is sacred here and everything is up for humor, including the franchise itself. The movie features witchcraft to animate a sexy snowman, a double entendre conversation about turkeys. There are references to “Sex and the City,” Bill Cosby, Tucker Carlson’s “End of Men” idea about radiating genitals, pop-up Halloween stores, and TIVOs. And, as always in these films, the jokes fly by so fast and so shamelessly that by the time you realize you didn’t like one, three funnier ones have appeared.

Parents should know that this movie has non-stop silly jokes, some of it suggestive or vulgar, with bathroom humor, a threesome (with a snowman!), silhouettes that appear to be sex acts, and a bare bottom. The storyline includes a murder, a violent bank robbery, a reference to suicide, and a dastardly criminal plot. There is some strong language, including the r-word.

Family discussion: This movie has many different kinds of humor. How many can you identify? How does this movie connect to the originals and what does it do differently? In what ways do both Drebin and Cane think the world was better before?

If you like this, try: the earlier “Naked Gun” television series and films

The Fantastic Four: First Steps

Posted on July 22, 2025 at 12:19 pm

B +

Lowest Recommended Age:	Middle School
MPAA Rating:	Rated PG-13 for action/violence and some language
Profanity:	Brief mild language
Alcohol/ Drugs:	None
Violence/ Scariness:	Extended comic book/action-style peril and violence, some graphic images
Diversity Issues:	None
Date Released to Theaters:	July 25, 2025

Four seems to be the magic number. After three unsatisfactory tries at getting Marvel’s cosmic ray-enhanced superheroes on screen, Marvel Studios got it right, gorgeously produced, well cast, gracefully relegating the origin story to a few “archival” clips, and putting our quartet and us right in the middle of the action.

It is set in a fantasy version of the 1960s, inspired by the visual style, not the history or pop culture. In the first scene, Reed is looking for iodine, the painful antiseptic used for minor cuts in the 50s, and Sue Storm uses something that was not invented in our reality until the 1980s. There is a Calder mobile in their headquarters living room and the men we see in the outdoor scenes all wear hats, so handsome this movie just might bring back the fedora. The production design from “Loki’s” Kasra Farahani is dazzling and endlessly inviting, a heightened version of a mid-century concept of the future. The cerulean blue and white accents of the retro F4 uniforms designed by Alexandra Byrne (“Guardians of the Galaxy”) place us in a time and a world that is like but not the same as ours.

The Four are Reed Richards (Pedro Pascal), a brilliant scientist whose body stretches, his wife Sue (Vanessa Kirby) who has the power of invisibility, including creating invisible shields, Sue’s impetuous and very single brother Johnny (Joseph Quinn), who can burst into flames and fly, and Ben Grimm, known as The Thing (Ebon Moss-Bachrach), who looks like he is made from mountain rock and is very, very strong.

As the movie begins, the world is celebrating them as heroes and protectors. It has been four years since the space expedition exposed them to the cosmic rays, they have defeated or, in the case of the subterranean Mole Man (Paul Walter Hauser), negotiated a peace agreement, and established a United Nations-type organization called the Future Foundation.

The superheroes and the people they protect believe F4 and their adorable robot, Herbie, will always keep them safe. And then they face their biggest and most terrifying challenge. Sue is pregnant. While Reed and Sue know that the molecular changes from the cosmic rays may affect the baby, they believe, with some reassurance from Sue’s ability to make her abdomen invisible so they can see the fetus, the baby will be fine.

Big and terrifying challenge #2: the Silver Surfer (Julia Garner) arrives to announce that Earth is about to be consumed by Galactus (Ralph Ineson), a planet devourer. F4 tracks the Silver Surfer to find Galactus, confident they can defeat him. And this leads to the first Marvel action sequence that features a very pregnant superhero. Galactus offers them a terrible choice, and when they refuse, the people on earth quickly go from fans to haters.

The film moves briskly, with one of the shortest run times in the MCU, under two hours. But it creates a fully-realized world, with small details like the Mole Man’s dad jokes, Ben Grimm’s “beard” and copy of 50s classic child care bible Dr. Spock, and a sweet brief appearance by Natasha Lyonne as the teacher of students who are big fans of The Thing. Fans will enjoy some glimpses of popular villains from the comic books. Director Matt Shakman (the similarly retro fantasies “Game of Thrones” and “Wandavision” and “The Great”) understands that the action scenes and the family dynamic are central to the storyline and he has fun with scale when Galactus arrives. While the stakes are dire, he stays away from gratuitous carnage. The film has good-natured humor, impressive special effects, some tender moments, and even a light gloss of commentary on what we expect from our heroes, and how we approach moral dilemmas and life-threatening challenges. I’m iffy about one twist, but overall, this is a film that respects comic book characters and what we love about them.

Parents should know that this movie features extended comic book/action-style peril and violence, with some scary creatures and disturbing and graphic images. There are mild references to reproductive biology and a woman goes into labor (discreetly filmed). Characters use some mild language.

Family discussion: Philosopher Jeremy Bentham argued that all decisions should be based on the greatest good for the largest number of people. How does that idea appear in this film and do you agree? What do you think will happen to Franklin? What is the law of levers and how do you see it around you?

If you like this, try: “Superman,” The Fantastic Four comics, and maybe just for fun watch the earlier films so you can compare them.

NOTE: Stay through the credits for one extra scene indicating where the story is going and, at the very end, a nostalgic moment.